The Old Fart's Festival guide to surviving the Edinburgh Fringe 2017

As a veteran of the Edinburgh Fringe – he took his first trip up in the Seventies – Chris Bratt has some top tips for fellow 60-something revellers hoping to survive the month-long fun and madness. Now, let's pack those cases...

Street performance on the Royal Mile: our seasoned festivalgoer will be sharing tips throughout the month (Getty)

So, here I am starting to pack things for yet another month in Edinburgh. And this year is a special one: a 70th anniversary – almost as old as me! The Festival’s original aim: to re-unite Europe through things cultural. And we're about to Brexit!

A seasoned Fringe visitor, I was persuaded last year by thespian forces beyond my control (the significance of that will emerge over the coming entries) to offer my thoughts on surviving the mania that is Edinburgh in August in a personal diary, known as a blog. It was a success, I am told; I had a good many hits and, several times, I was apparently re-tweeted (which proved painless). You will perhaps have realised, so soon in our new relationship, that I am not of the modern computer-literate, social media cognoscenti.

No, rather, I am variously described as senior citizen, old fart, an over the hill, past it, sad old man; one who is now hoping this year to be read by you in the much more cerebral realms of this, my favourite newspaper – albeit one that is online! I am offering these reflections particularly to any seniors who might be venturing to Edinburgh for the first time. I trust they will not mind being lumped under the Old Farts’ Festival umbrella – a useful shelter if the Edinburgh weather proves normal. But all seniors are eligible for a concessionary rate* at pretty much every location; so don’t forget to ask for it – you know you’re worth it. And hopefully, my ramblings will strike a chord with all those already familiar with the month’s shenanigans.

*Defined as for “senior citizens in receipt of a state pension”. At least we won’t have to wait until we’re 68.

First, perhaps, an introduction. My first Fringe visit was way back in 1970, when things were very different and I, of course, was much younger. My wife and I, after a car trip – which took in Glasgow, Loch Ness, Skye, Inverness and all places in between – actually camped for a few days in a small tent on the outskirts of the city somewhere (memory fades!) and drove to the various venues: from school halls to pubs. It was all free back then.

After a longish gap, more than 25 years in fact, our daughter went to university, took up drama and performed at the Fringe. The parents came to see her perform (of course) and, for the subsequent years, have been regular visitors to the Edinburgh Festivals. Sad, or mad? Possibly both.

In latter years, we have spent the whole of August in Edinburgh and our record, to date, is 153 shows in the month. That’s all sorts of shows: drama, music, comedy, books. We would like to know if anyone can beat that – anyone sane, that is.

The purpose of this blog is to share our experiences and proffer tips for surviving the madness and joy that is the Fringe, particularly for those of mature years. And even more particularly if it’s a first visit. I will also report on the shows that we have seen and what we thought of them. I will, from time to time, also recommend eateries – especially those that can cope with the question: “We’ve got 40 minutes before our next show, can we have the pre-theatre three-course meal, please?”

I would like to share experiences and would welcome comments from the thousands of other old farts who will doubtless read the daily blogs on festivaloldfart.wordpress.com or in the Independent online offerings – assuming they can master the technology, or have a six-year-old grandchild to help them! So please encourage anyone – old or young – to share the live blogs with anyone they think will be interested. I will assume if no one takes up the offer that I’m wasting my literary talents, that my advice is useless, and will simply open another bottle of wine.

I sincerely hope that we can all enjoy the Old Farts’ Festival together and that these musings may raise a chuckle and may even be of some use to younger visitors: and there will be quite a few of them there.

But we have not yet packed our cases, let alone drag them from the train to hail a cab to take us to our rented flat in Marchmont. And we may have some explaining to do when proffering our train tickets, which accidentally went through the laminator in my study and look a trifle burnt. That’s tomorrow’s excitement.

The next blog, this Wednesday, will suggest how you should begin planning which shows you will book.

See you somewhere on the Fringe!