MISCELLANY: YOUR STARS: IT COULD HAPPEN
Saturday 17 April 1999
There is something rather awful about Taurus - the car coats you wear for your Sunday drive around the common. You are usually union officials, horse trainers, and unsuccessful welterweights (especially the women). Taurus is the solid, acquisitive sign of tax plans, household accounts and deferred gratification. It's the sign of bank managers (Jacob and Guy de Rothschild). In the Taurean soul it's always Sunday afternoon three hours before the pubs open. Only Taureans found Tony Hancock funny.
The monotonous certainty which you bring to your views means that you do well in politics, but not very well. Your chief talent is loyalty. All the politicians you've never heard of are Taureans, and much of Britain's post-war decline can be ascribed to the conservative sloth and implacable self-interest of this wretched sign. But some ambitious Taureans do add texture to their lives by involving themselves in totalitarian government. They know the pit of the bourgeois heart and can tap its latent rage to wreak monstrous horror (Karl Marx, Lenin, Hitler, Lucrezia Borgia, Lonnie Donegan). Finally, their most significant talent is to die memorably (Jayne Mansfield, the topless actress).
Film Leonardo DiCaprio hunts Tom Hardy
Arts & Ents blogs
- 1 Porn block in India: hundreds of sexual websites banned, internet outraged
- 2 Malaysia issues arrest warrant for Gordon Brown’s sister-in-law after she publishes stories on leader Najib Razak's financial affairs
- 3 Gamers confess the worst things they've done in The Sims
- 4 Sex with robots will be ‘the norm’ in 50 years
- 5 Barack Obama turns 54: The US President's best put downs to celebrate his birthday
The Great British Bake Off, series 6, preview: The most popular show on television is back
National Geographic Traveler Photo Contest 2015 winners in pictures
US bookshop offers Go Set A Watchman refunds over false marketing as 'nice summer novel'
Sherlock season 4: Benedict Cumberbatch will be 'a lot less brattish' in Victorian special
Bollywood stars Amitabh Bachchan, Salman Khan and Akshay Kumar enter Forbes’ highest paid actors list for first time
Is Britain really full up? Are migrants taking our jobs? Leading academic answers the most common anti-immigration claims
Calais Migrant Crisis: Deputy Mayor of Calais labels Cameron's use of 'swarm' as 'racist' and 'ignorant'
Chris Leslie: Jeremy Corbyn's anti-austerity agenda will harm the poor, says Labour shadow Chancellor
Landlords renting properties to illegal immigrants to face up to five years in prison
While we fixate on Calais, the Home Office is quietly deporting dozens of migrants on 'ghost flights'
Labour leadership race: Jeremy Corbyn could be the next Prime Minister, says Ken Clarke