Poetic Licence: A Patient Writes
A debate is currently raging over the strict code of ethics forbidding consensual sex between doctors and patients. Why don't they ask the patients?
Wednesday 26 June 1996
Doctors ooze allure
Should they shtup their patients?
Why not? Sure!
Doctors must get lonely
Look how hard they work
Are their only perk.
Help your doctor help you
Lie down on the floor
Sigh: "Oh, God, I love you
More. More. More."
Ring the BMA up
That's the thing to do
Say your doctor's knackered
Then they send you two.
If a doctor calls you
Asks you how you are
Then proposes meeting
Later in a bar
Don't be sanctimonious
Change and comb your hair
Long as it's consensual
Nobody should care
Why do all these killjoys
Hurry to condemn?
It's because the doctor
Doesn't fancy them
Do the patients want it?
Yes, of course we do!
Only thing that stalls us
Is the endless queue.
Game of Thrones
Arts & Ents blogs
- 1 Huawei Mate S and Huawei Watch: new products take on iPhone 6 Plus and Apple Watch
- 2 More than 11,000 Icelanders offer to house Syrian refugees to help European crisis
- 3 If these extraordinarily powerful images of a dead Syrian child washed up on a beach don't change Europe's attitude to refugees, what will?
- 4 Senior British politicians tell David Cameron: When dead children are being washed up on beaches – it's time to act
- 5 Make your voice heard: Sign The Independent's petition to welcome refugees
The real reason Eddie Redmayne was cast as a trans woman in The Danish Girl
Idris Elba is ‘too street’ to play 007, says James Bond author
This little boy loves books so much that he cries when his mother stops reading to him
Akram Khan: Choreographer says dance is 'as important as maths and being a doctor'
Idris Elba responds to comments he's 'too street' to play James Bond as 007 author apologises for controversial comment
Climate change: 2015 will be the hottest year on record 'by a mile', experts say
Senior British politicians tell David Cameron: When dead children are being washed up on beaches – it's time to act
Jeremy Corbyn calls Osama bin Laden's killing a 'tragedy' - but was it taken out of context?
If these extraordinarily powerful images of a dead Syrian child washed up on a beach don't change Europe's attitude to refugees, what will?
If you're not already angry about the refugee crisis, here's a history lesson to remind you why you really should be
Theresa May says migrants should be banned from entering the UK unless they have jobs lined up