Poetic Licence: Sooty - My Drugs Hell
Thursday 25 March 1999
When the scandal broke, a tight-lipped Sooty
Baseball-cap pulled down across his face
Read the papers, speeding from the courtroom
Tabloid hacks on motorbikes gave chase
Current pictures of the pale puppet
Contrast badly with an early one:
Happier days with drumkit by the seaside.
"What Is Wrong With Sooty?" screams The Sun.
Panda Sue: "We all just felt so powerless
Watching him descend the slippery slope
No one knew the pressure he was under
And I guess he found it hard to cope."
In a private clinic near Roehampton
Sweep toyed with his salad and confessed:
"Me an' Soot? We went for it, yeah. Big-style.
But it's what you do when you're the best.
Don't think we're the only ones to go there.
Teletubbies. They won't last the pace.
Check out Tinky Winky on a bad day.
There's a boy who isn't on the case."
Sooty: "Everyone's been so supportive.
All the cast have sent me cards and stuff
Since the story broke on Monday morning
That was when the gig got really rough.
Hopefully the worst of it's behind me
Now that Geri's brought me here to France
And of course, George Michael lent his chateau
Thanks to them, I've got this second chance.
That's the danger when you're in this business
Some of us burn out before we peak
Look at Sweep, he never got his voice back
Over 40 years he's had that squeak
Not something you talk about in public
Basically, you fear what fans will think
People's hands inside you each performance
That's the one that sends you to the brink."
tv Review: Miranda Hart and co deliver the festive goods
tvReview: Older generation get hot under the collar this Christmas
Arts & Ents blogs
- 1 The political parties aren't all the same – which means 2015 will be a 'big-choice' election
- 2 President of Argentina adopts Jewish godson to 'stop him turning into a werewolf'
- 3 ALS ice bucket challenge co-founder Corey Griffin drowns, aged 27
- 4 The 'Black Museum': After 150 years, public set to see exhibits from police’s grisly crime museum
- 5 Naomi Wolf reacts to Isis 'conspiracy theories' critism after she questions whether beheading videos are real
Downton Abbey Christmas special 2014, review: Love is everywhere, actually
The golden age of TV comedy is here
The Boy in the Dress, TV review: David Walliams' Boxing Day treat is a celebration of being different
Best movies on Netflix UK and US: 32 films that will end your endless scrolling
From Marvel to Star Wars: The rise of cinema’s shared universes
British actor Idris Elba cannot star as James Bond because he is black, says shock jock Rush Limbaugh
Ukip member gets into Christmas spirit with Union Flag plea to Santa 'for our country back'
Germany anti-Islam protests: 17,000 march on Dresden against 'Islamification of the West'
Immigrants make UK racist, says Ukip councillor Trevor Shonk
Nigel Farage: Ukip leader named 'Briton of the year' by The Times
BBC director Danny Cohen: Rising UK antisemitism makes me feel more uncomfortable than ever