Pop: Lyric Sheets
Friday 30 April 1999
Kangaroo Loose in Top Paddock
Those people whom the gods dislike
They first give record deals to
To tap the lunacy at source
A monstrous ego helps of course
To summon up the kangaroo
Where simple talent just won't do
Boing boing, boingy-boing
"Oh Daddy - you're not watching me!"
The kangaroo's all sympathy
What huge conceit there needs to be
To take the world on piece by piece
Armed only with your press release
The earlier pop stars, mostly men
Who courted madness now and then
Were smiled on when they trashed their flats
And crashed their planes or murdered bats
Now things being equal, women too
Get visits from the kangaroo
We whom the gods do not make stars
Must stand in streets and shout at cars,
A tortured background's not enough
But wealth or fame are perfect stuff
Since then they send a camera crew
To interview the kangaroo
Boing boing, boingy-boing
Over the field and through the gate
Across the threshold up the hall
The kangaroo has come to call
And as he has arrived at least
One may as well dress up as priest
What church is that she advocates?
St Barking of the Missing Slates?
Of course. It's just across the way
We wibble while we kneel to pray
Commend to us those things we lack
Until the doctors take us back
Film The critics but sneer but these unfashionable festive films are our favourites
TV We're so close to knowing what happened to Oliver Hughes, but a last-minute bluff crushes expectations
Arts & Ents blogs
- 1 Nigel Farage: Me vs Russell Brand on Question Time – he's got the chest hair but where are his ideas?
- 2 Harry Potter fans can apply to the Hogwarts-inspired College of Wizardry
- 3 Jessica Chambers: 19-year-old woman 'doused with lighter fluid and burned alive' in the US
- 4 Russell Brand calls Nigel Farage 'poundshop Enoch Powell' in BBC Question Time debate
- 5 Orange Wednesdays are no more
Peter Lik: The self-proclaimed 'fine-art photographer' whose work sells for millions
The best underrated Christmas movies from Love, Actually to While You Were Sleeping
Grace Dent on TV: The Lost Honour of Christopher Jefferies was a beautifully shot, immensely considered drama
The Lost Honour of Christopher Jefferies, review: Jason Watkins is brilliant, but real victim Joanna Yeates is reduced to a footnote
Marilyn Manson denies involvement in shocking Lana Del Rey rape video
Nigel Farage: Me vs Russell Brand on Question Time – he's got the chest hair but where are his ideas?
Shock poll shows voters believe Ukip is to the left of the Tories
Disgruntled RBS worker writes hilarious open letter to Russell Brand after anti-capitalist publicity stunt leaves him hungry
New era of cheap oil 'will destroy green revolution'
Ukip founder Alan Sked and Nigel Farage 'begged Enoch Powell to stand as a candidate'
Ukip candidate jokes about 'shooting peasants' in racist and homophobic rant