Here are all the jokes made at Jeremy Clarkson’s expense during his Have I Got News For You return

'It’s nice to be back. Welcome to Have I Got News For You. I used to be Jeremy Clarkson.'

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The Independent Culture

Jeremy Clarkson makes his first TV appearance since the Top Gear ‘fracas’ tonight, guest hosting Have I Got News For You.

Unsurprisingly, most of the jokes are focused on his ignominious exit from the show, and his lucrative new job at Amazon Prime.

The Daily Mirror was at the taping, and noted them down:

- Ian Hislop turns a remark about Labour leader Jeremy Corbyn into a swipe at Clarkson: “A man called Jeremy who has extreme views and won’t be in a job for long”.

- He also jokes about the Amazon deal: “I thought you’d be delivering packages to my door.”

- When there’s a sound problem, guest Richard Osman says: “This wouldn’t happen on Amazon Prime. Are you sure it’s Amazon Prime and not Amazon past-their-prime?”

- There are a ton of punch jokes, with Merton shouting “don’t hit me!” when Clarkson says "oh f*ck off” after stumbling over an autocue line.

Clarkson also pokes fun at himself though, opening the show by saying:

“It’s nice to be back. Welcome to Have I Got News For You. I used to be Jeremy Clarkson.”

He later adds, with regards to not being able to talk about motoring on the channel anymore:

“I can’t talk about cars on the BBC. I can’t say the C word,” before back-tracking: “What are they going to do? F*cking sack me? They can’t. This is fun.”

Have I Got News For You airs tonight on BBC1 at 9pm.

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