Last Night's Television - Russell Brand: Skinned, Channel 4; Robson Green's Wild Swimming Adventure, ITV1

The lengths he'll go to

Take a likeable minor television celebrity, a random location, an offbeat activity, affix the word "adventure" to the title, and voilà: two hours' worth of prime-time programming. Hence, Stephen Tompkinson's African Balloon Adventure,
Robson Green's Wild Swimming Adventure, and Adam Woodyatt's Galashiels Spelunking Adventure (I made the last one up). Anyway, ITV1 is fond of the format, and of Robson Green. Thus, Robson Green's Wild Swimming Adventure – that one was real – which began with a dream sequence, of the young Green trotting through a pastoral idyll, freshwater stream and all.

Green has always been drawn to water, he explained as he revisited Seaton Burn, where he, "Snadge" and "Bananas" used to swim as children. (He didn't clarify whether Snadge and Bananas were siblings, friends or family pets.) His miner father, whom he idolised, used to chuck him into the North Sea in his Y-fronts. And since Green Sr's recent passing, Green Jr had decided to swim to Holy Island, in their native North-east, as a tribute of sorts. We'll have to wait until next week to find out whether he made it.

Green is a strong amateur swimmer, but there's a big difference between a few lengths of the local indoor pool and an endurance swim through bone-chilling open sea. So, to prepare himself for the challenge, he took a tour of the country's various wild-water swimming options, from a lido in Plymouth, to Britain's oldest lake swimming club at Henleaze in Bristol, to a moonlit hot tub in the company of the Outdoor Swimming Society's comely founder, Kate Rew. Along the way, he showed no compunction about changing into his "budgie-smugglers" in front of various middle-aged women, who had evidently been told to look excited by the prospect.

In fact, the whole thing seemed a little too contrived at times. In one particularly implausible sequence – fortuitously filmed from multiple angles, including a helicopter – Green had to be "rescued" by the local river police after taking an impromptu dip in the Tyne. What with all the actorly romanticising of his personal journey, it was hard to separate the self-indulgent performer from the real person. His fellow wild swimmers were often charming eccentrics, well worth a few minutes more screen time, but instead the show began to feel like a strange, slightly corny ego trip.

Until, that is, the arrival of "human polar bear" Lewis Pugh, the man who swam the North Pole in 2007 and lost all feeling in his fingers for four months as a result. Pugh accompanied Green for a swim in Snowdonia's Llyn Llydaw, the coldest lake in Britain, and not only knocked all the ego out of him, but also enlivened the programme, wresting control of the narrative from its presenter. When Green emerged from the 8C water, his head spun, his legs gave way beneath him and he had to be swaddled and carried to a warm waiting Range Rover. The impervious Pugh, on the other hand, strode happily from the lake in his budgie-smugglers.

There was no danger whatsoever of anyone wresting control of Russell Brand: Skinned from its star, even though the second half of the title referred to Frank Skinner, whose sit-down interview with Brand formed the spine of this shapeless and curiously unrevealing documentary. Or at least it seemed unrevealing, because so much of Brand's life comes pre-revealed. Unfortunately for the programme-makers, their subject has built his stand-up career on confessional routines, so even when he was describing his most private thoughts to his fellow comedian, I felt like I'd heard it all before.

Still, neither man is ever less than engaging, especially when they're talking about themselves. Brand, much of whose recent Scandalous tour revolves around so-called Sachsgate, spoke intelligently about the affair. Clear-eyed when it comes to his own mistakes, he also argued convincingly that they were amplified by the context of the disputed BBC licence fee, Jonathan Ross's salary, and the hammed-up outrage of the press.

The most interesting moments of their conversation came when Skinner paralleled Brand's experiences with his own comparatively sedate career. Skinner admitted to having "done a lot of groupie-ing" in his time, but was troubled by the blot such behaviour might have left on his moral copybook. Brand agreed, but often, he said, he's simply overcome by the "oestrogen-filled mist" that descends on his gigs. He created his womanising, Byronic goth persona, he confessed, partly as a substitute for the drugs and alcohol that once sustained him. Now that it's brought him the fame he craved, he's stuck with it. "My personality does not work without fame," he joked. "Without fame, this haircut just looks like mental illness."

Skinner also praised Brand for having – with his distinctive estuary eloquence – made it cool to be articulate, a fantastic compliment from a comedian who'll probably always be associated with mid-Nineties laddism, which sadly had the opposite effect. At one point, Brand went into lyrical detail about his ritual, pre-gig poo, describing it as a physical and spiritual cleansing that prepares him to meet his adoring public. Hmm, Skinner replied, "Most comedians just call that 'the comedy shit'."

Independent Comment
blog comments powered by Disqus

Day In a Page

Picture preview: Lucian Freud drawings

Lucian Freud drawings

Picture preview
Silent revolution at the Baftas as the French take top awards

Silent revolution at the Baftas

The Artist wins in seven categories, with Meryl Streep the other big success story
Whitney Houston: The diva who had – and lost – it all

The diva who had – and lost – it all

Nick Hasted charts the highs and lows of Whitney Houston's life
How Picasso won over (some of) the British

How Picasso won over (some of) the British

Winston Churchill and Evelyn Waugh hated his work, but Picasso provided inspiration for a whole generation of UK artists
Topshop: A Decade Of Design

Topshop: A Decade Of Design

When London Fashion Week starts on Friday, Topshop will celebrate 10 years backing its brightest young stars
John Prescott: 'My wife thought I'd just retire, but I'm not a slippers man'

'My wife thought I'd just retire, but I'm not a slippers man'

At 73, John Prescott isn't mellowing. In fact he's taking a shot at becoming a police commissioner
Jim Gamble: We are losing the race to protect our young

Jim Gamble: We are losing the race to protect our young

Technology and the children who use it won't wait for slow-moving child-protection services and police to catch up
Sarah Sands: A friend is not the one you turn to, but the person who turns to you

Sarah Sands on friendship

A friend is not the one you turn to, but the person who turns to you
Andy Burnham: 'It's a genie out of the bottle moment'

Andy Burnham interview

'It's a genie out of the bottle moment'
Leveson: What we've learnt so far

Leveson: What we've learnt so far

Ingenious hacks, shifty editors and attacks of Sudden Memory Loss Syndrome – Matthew Bell assesses the state of play at the Royal Courts of Justice
Modern lovers: The 'sexual body warriors' and pioneers transforming 21st-century relationships

Modern lovers: The 'sexual body warriors'

Sarah Morrison meets the people redefining love in the 21st century.
'I was angry, so angry': How heartbreak, betrayal and Su Pollard helped Estelle find pop success

Estelle: 'I was angry, so angry'

The singer talks about heartache, betrayal and bouncing back.
Choc tactics: Bill Granger's Valentine's recipes for chocoholics

Bill Granger's Valentine's recipes for chocoholics

Should it be white, milk or plain? Can you make a melt-in-the-mouth pudding without using any?
Male, pale & stale: Could more women on the board help Mothercare – and other ailing firms?

Male, pale & stale

Could more women on the board help Mothercare – and other ailing firms?
Upstairs, downstairs, 2012-style

Upstairs, downstairs, 2012-style

There are now more domestic workers in Britain than in Edwardian times