Last Night's TV: Two Jews on a Cruise: A Wonderland Film, BBC2

 

Suggested Topics

I don't know whether you remember Gaby and Tikwah. They were last on our screens in Paddy Wivell's 2011 Wonderland documentary about Hasidic weddings.

They weren't a typical Hasidic couple exactly and there may have been members of the community who felt they were altogether too accommodating to the man from the BBC. But for an outsider they were memorably charming and they clearly captivated Wivell himself, because he's gone back for a second helping, this time following Gaby and his long-suffering wife on their first holiday in more than 40 years of marriage. What a holiday, too, a Mediterranean cruise on the Golden Iris, departing for multiple ports from Haifa. As a man who approaches observance as a competitive sport (he chucklingly owned up to the fact later), I don't think Gaby would even have set foot on the gang-plank if the cruise hadn't been 100 per cent kosher. But even so he was a long way from Stamford Hill. "What would you like on the cruise?" he asked Tikwah excitedly before they set off. "I want to enjoy the Jacuzzi."

The truth was that what Tikwah would like is more attention from her husband, and the melancholy thread that ran through Two Jews on a Cruise was that Gaby found it very difficult to meet this simple need. Within five minutes of embarking, he'd disappeared, confirming Tikwah's wary prediction earlier that "once he starts talking to other people he forgets me". "Ahh, you're such a schlimazel," she scolded when she eventually tracked him down. Gaby's clubbability is a volatile quality, though, which can tip in a moment into megaphone misanthropy. As they queued for their first onshore excursion in Crete, Tikwah became a little distressed at the crush to get the best seat on the coach, but Gaby loudly assured her he was fine: "I don't see any of these people," he said as he buried himself in his prayer book, "to me, they're all like animals." Some of the animals looked a bit startled by his candour.

There was lots to do on board, but Gaby and Tikwah didn't last long at the cabaret, the combination of amplified music and dancers' cleavage driving them out of the door. Fortunately, they were long gone before the belly dancer arrived. They weren't much interested in the food-sculpting demonstration or aerobic classes either, and they couldn't go swimming because women and men shared the pool. But Tikwah had signed them up for the on-board relationship-counselling sessions, at which Gaby, a man intimately at home with ancient Talmudic wisdom, found himself obediently parroting Californian therapeutic jargon. "Ask him if he's willing to cross the bridge and come to Tikwah-land and listen to what you're saying," the therapist told Tikwah. Gaby insisted he was, but it didn't do him much good. "Do you feel like he understands you?" the counsellor asked after Gaby had dutifully "mirrored" his wife's concerns. "No," she replied sceptically.

Not everyone was as keen to spend more time with Gaby as Tikwah. "I live for arguments... I like to make awkward situations... I love it," he explained cheerfully, after getting into a blazing row at the creative towel-folding workshop with a woman who was annoying Tikwah by talking too much. He also provoked an on-shore guide into a bristly argument about the sacredness of nature and caused some exasperated raised eyebrows with his requests for rabbinical clarification as to whether it was acceptable to leave the vessel during sabbath. But when he finally realised that Tikwah was genuinely hurt by his lack of attention, he did his limited best to put things right, buying her a present and bringing her breakfast in bed. "It will come down with a bang when we get home," Tikwah said, chuckling. It did, but Wivell's very funny and often touching film was wise enough to accommodate the fact that a good marriage need not be a perfect one.

Independent Comment
blog comments powered by Disqus
News in pictures
World news in pictures
Arts & Ents blogs

Brighton Fringe 2013 – Is everyone sitting uncomfortably?

Fancy seeing a play about serial killers? How about inviting a funeral director into your home for a...

The Fall ‘Darkness Visible’ – Series 1, episode 2

There are a good many moments in the second episode of this psychological thriller that deserve refl...

‘Vicious’ – Series 1, episode 4

The opening titles squeal ‘Never Can Say Goodbye…’. Oh Lord how I wish I could heave this series off...

       
Independent
Travel Shop
India and Shimla
14 nights from only £1899pp Find out more
Prague city break
Three nights from £199pp Find out more
4* Soreda hotel break, Malta
Seven nights all-inclusive from £399pp Find out more

ES Rentals

    James Pembroke: The man who's eaten everywhere

    The man who's eaten everywhere

    Few people know more about restaurants than James Pembroke, who only spent five mealtimes at home during his entire childhood.
    A Berliner in 1963 – but did John F Kennedy once admire Adolf Hitler?

    A Berliner in 1963 – but did John F Kennedy once admire Adolf Hitler?

    The young JFK praised 'superior' Nordic races during visits to Germany
    Banned Iranian director Mohammad Rasoulof to attend Cannes Film Festival 2013, his first public appearance since prison

    Banned Iranian director to attend Cannes Film Festival

    Mohammad Rasoulof to make his first public appearance since being imprisoned three years ago
    Seeing the larger picture: Inspiring images of space

    Seeing the larger picture: Inspiring images of space

    An exhibition explores images how photography has shaped astronomy
    Eat Spam and carry on: Wartime pamphlets could teach us a thing or two about healthy, thrifty eating

    Eat Spam and carry on

    Wartime pamphlets could teach us a thing or two about healthy, thrifty eating
    Facial hair: Cat beards and the purrrsuit of excellence

    Facial hair

    Cat beards and the purrrsuit of excellence
    The 10 Best salt and pepper sets

    The 10 Best salt and pepper sets

    Whether they're for everyday use or to make your dining table look just right, it's worth getting a stylish shaker...
    Ferran Soriano: Predicting success if Manchester City 'vision' is followed

    Ferran Soriano: Predicting success if Manchester City 'vision' is followed

    Chief executive says trophies will come if a 'core' of suitable players is in place
    Thomas Müller: We couldn't handle losing a Champions League Final again

    Thomas Müller: We couldn't handle losing a Champions League Final again

    The Bayern Munich forward tells Tim Rich his side have to shed chokers' tag after two recent final defeats
    Giro d'Italia: The Stelvio Pass - cycling's killer climb

    The Stelvio Pass - cycling's killer climb

    As the Giro d'Italia tackles the brutal climb, Simon Usborne takes on the snow and switchbacks – and soon realises what the fuss is about
    National archives: Edward VIII’s phone calls - and how MI5 bugged them

    Edward VIII’s phone calls - and how MI5 bugged them

    Newly unearthed papers reveal a shocking extra dimension to the constitutional crisis over monarch’s abdication
    Sent down at the Old Bailey: A tour of the world's most famous court

    Sent down at the Old Bailey

    A tour of the world's most famous court
    Hollywood's random acts of red-carpet kindness

    Hollywood's random acts of red-carpet kindness

    The Hangover actor Zach Galifianakis’s date for his movie premieres isn’t arm candy  – it’s his 87-year-old friend who he saved from homelessness
    British football scores an own goal

    British football scores an own goal

    Many managers barely survive a year in post. Martin Baker talks to experts who make a case for clubs using forensic business skills to find the best staff
    James Lawton: Sergio Garcia cracks as major fault line opens up again

    James Lawton

    Sergio Garcia cracks as major fault line opens up again