Words: outfake, n.

Click to follow
The Independent Culture
THE NEW Oxford Dictionary of Idioms only says of watching paint dry that it is "extremely boring"; in fact, after toshing with a roller, to step back and judge the effect (Rothko? Rolf Harris?) can soothe. My latest stint was done to the sound of Billie Holiday, but after pressing the repeat button, I could not eject this wrong disc with gungy fingers: six times over there were eight takes of "A Fine Romance".

These are genuine, but on the Beatles' Anthology sets some takes are conflated, and derided by collectors as outfakes - not yet in any dictionary. Meanwhile, EMI's charging CD prices for Internet music is a scam, as manufacturing costs are minimal. Instead, it should thus issue full versions of "Helter Skelter" and "12-Bar Blues".