I signed up for this – but I wasn’t anticipating Lola’s new BFF being Jesus

When her daughter can hardly contain her excitement at the birth of a new baby, Charlotte Cripps wonders if the expectant mum would like all her old baby kit. And then the reality dawns on her…

(Amara May)

Lola told me yesterday a baby is being born. “That’s nice! Whose baby,” I ask her. I haven’t noticed anyone pregnant at the school gates. But she’s so animated it’s got me thinking: I’m doing a big clear-out and I’ve got tons of baby kit: prams, cots, bouncers, sleep pods, breast pumps. Maybe this is the good home I've been looking for? 

I ask her again: “Which friend at school is having a new brother or sister?” But when I press her for an answer – she’s confused. It dawns on me something is a bit off.  She is mumbling something about it being born in the church at Christmas and wants to go out shopping for it. 

I take a  deep breath and look her square in the eyes and say: “Is this baby called Jesus by any chance ?” “Yes!” she whoops with excitement. “How did you guess the little baby’s name?” That’s when I realise her religious education is kicking off in full force.