How to the look: Hybrid boots

'Blythe' shoe-boots from Danish label Ganni, £185, plumo.com

So designers have been tinkering away in the atelier, cross-breeding boots. What with? Backpacks? Bikinis? Tomato plants?

Nothing so avant-garde, I'm afraid. We're just dealing with small modifications, and all within the footwear genus. Thus we now have shoots (shoe-boots) and shbandals (shoe-boot-sandals).

Not the shbandal! I hope you're not advocating boots with peep-toes again. The raison d'être of a boot is to keep your toes warm and save you money on a pedicure, you know.

Could I interest you in a peep-heel, instead? Asos, for instance, has a punky patent buckled style called Auckland (£55, asos.com) with a cutaway heel that's perfect for those days when your toes are chilly but the backs of your feet are just too darn hot.

How terribly practical. Try another one on me…

OK, slightly less bonkers and decidedly more elegant are these ever-so-slightly sparkly, slash-fronted "Blythe" shoe-boots from Danish label Ganni (£185, plumo.com, above). More delicate than your usual ankle boot with the deep V-opening, they'll keep both toes and heels toasty. No, don't say anything… you're welcome!