How to talk to kids about weight and healthy eating

A new resource gives guidance for parents and carers on how to tackle these topics with children aged four to 11.

New guidance suggests how to talk to children about weight and healthy eating (Alamy/PA)

Talking more positively about food and physical activity in the home could be the key to opening up conversations between parents and kids about weight, according to new guidance.

The resource from researchers at the University of Bath with the British Dietetic Association (BDA) Obesity and Paediatric Specialist Groups gives advice to parents and carers on the best way to talk to children about their weight.

It comes in response to the growing challenge of childhood obesity in the UK. According to NHS Digital data, a quarter of all children in year six are living with obesity, with the rates being highest in poorer areas. The number of children with obesity has risen in England during the pandemic.

Lead researcher, professor Fiona Gillison of the department for health at the University of Bath, said: “Creating the guidance has been the result of many years of work to try and reduce some of the anxiety, and help families to have open and constructive conversations about weight – if and when they need to.”

The guidance, ‘Talking to your child about weight’, was developed with input from experts, children and parents, and focuses on kids aged between four and 11.

Key advice for parents and carers includes not ignoring the topic of weight. Talking about it openly can build trust and prevent children from being ashamed about it, experts suggest.

It recommends being positive about food and exercise – showing eating healthily and moving your body can be enjoyable, and isn’t just about controlling weight.

It also urges against criticising your own or other people’s weight or appearance, saying “this can make children think this is how you will judge them too”.

‘Weight’ shouldn’t be a banned word as this can create shame and worry, so talk openly about weight if your child wants to

Talking to your child about weight

Other recommendations include getting other adults involved, and choosing lifestyle changes together – so your child feels more empowered and involved in the process.

Experts suggest small conversations at natural times can work better than one ‘big’ talk, and some people might prefer not to use the word ‘weight’ – instead focusing on things like ‘growth’, ‘health’, ‘exercise’ or ‘healthy eating’. But that shouldn’t mean ‘weight’ is a banned word.

It also gives common scenarios – for example, if your child calls someone else ‘fat’ – with suggestions of how to reply.

Experts recommend responses like, ‘I guess he/she is larger than some people, but everyone looks different.’ Parents could also try asking children how the person would feel if they heard the child saying that, or taking a positive spin, by responding with, ‘Whatever their size, they may be just as clever/friendly as you are, and that’s much more important than what they look like’.