Your friend from overseas is standing outside Lillywhites, A-Z in one hand, camcorder in the other. So this is Piccadilly Circus. You, meanwhile, are sitting in a comfortable hessian chair enjoying a Columbian espresso (pounds 1.45) and a treacle tart (pounds 2.95) in Justin de Blank's fan-cooled Cafe de Columbia. Fortnum's clock is just striking twelve as your tourist poodles past the Royal Academy down Burlington Arcade, turning right into the Museum of Mankind. Pausing only to video the Easter Island statue given to the museum by Queen Victoria (who had no idea where to put it), they join you for a fashionable salad of rocket, parmesan, pears and walnuts (pounds 7) and a bottle of chilled white wine (pounds 9.95). Let's hope your friend is paying. Mon-Sat 10am-4.30pm/Sun 2-5pm.
Cafe de Columbia, Museum of Mankind, Burlington Gardens W1 (071-287 8148).
Tomorrow: Henry's Cafe Bar, Tobacco Dock E1.