Pembroke: Roll up, roll up

THE ENLIGHTENED TOBACCO COMPANY, which launched the much-publicised Death cigarettes two years ago, is raising cash through the Business Expansion Scheme and adding another brand to its portfolio. Death Lights, a low-tar, low-nicotine cigarette, is to be launched this year in a striking white packet with a black embossed skull and crossbones logo.

What's the point, you might think? 'We want to consolidate the brand and give honest smokers a choice - death or slow death,' explains managing director 'BJ' Cunningham cheerfully.

Loss-making but claiming to sell a million cigarettes a week, ETC is raising pounds 850,000 (closing date is Friday the 13th) to improve distribution and help reach its bold ambition of a 0.079 per cent of the UK's pounds 9bn baccy market. 'We've got good wholesale distribution but not good retail distribution,' says 'BJ'. 'We need a sales force to physically get the fags on the shelves.'

PETER DAVIS, chairman and chief executive of Reed Elsevier, clearly found yesterday's inaugural results meetings more taxing than expected. He had to cut the meetings short to dash off for an osteopath's appointment at noon after injuring his back while sailing in North Wales over the weekend. 'I just pulled on something a little too heavily,' he explains. 'The lunchtime appointment was the only one I could get.'

NEWS OF A REPORT, The Market for Condoms, reaches our desk. The 166-page survey analyses global trade in condoms and estimates it at a mind-boggling 8.5 billion units. In Japan, where brands include Wrinkle Zero-0, and one company sells condoms from door to door, men use an average of five each per year. This might not sound a lot but we are told that it equates to 600 million units.

CAN THIS be a coincidence? A mere five days after Colin Forsyth, a director of London United Investments, wrote to Michael Heseltine to complain about the lack of progress with the Government's three-year investigation into the insolvent insurance group, the inspectors have completed their report.

The news reached Mr Forsyth on the same day the Independent reported his suspicion that the report was being sat upon.

Still, completed is one thing, published is another. Mr Forsyth, and others concerned with Britain's biggest insurance insolvency, must hope the completed report does not disappear into the vortex of the DTI.

Suggested Topics
peopleFrankie Boyle responds to referendum result in characteristically offensive style
Life and Style
Couples have been having sex less in 2014, according to a new survey
New Articles
i100... with this review
Holly's review of Peterborough's Pizza Express quickly went viral on social media
footballTim Sherwood: This might be th match to wake up Manchester City
Arts and Entertainment
musicHow female vocalists are now writing their own hits
New Articles
ebooksAn unforgettable anthology of contemporary reportage
Arts and Entertainment
musicBiographer Hunter Davies has collected nearly a hundred original manuscripts
Blahnik says: 'I think I understand the English more than they do themselves'
Arts and Entertainment
Michelle Dockery as Lady Mary Crawley in Downton Abbey
TVInside Downton Abbey series 5
Life and Style
The term 'normcore' was given the oxygen of publicity by New York magazine during the autumn/winter shows in Paris in February
fashionWhen is a trend a non-trend? When it's Normcore, since you ask
Latest stories from i100
Have you tried new the Independent Digital Edition apps?
Independent Dating

By clicking 'Search' you
are agreeing to our
Terms of Use.

iJobs Job Widget
iJobs Money & Business

Senior BA - Motor and Home Insurance

£400 - £450 Per Day: Clearwater People Solutions Ltd: **URGENT CONTRACT ROLE**...

Market Risk & Control Manager

Up to £100k or £450p/d: Saxton Leigh: My client is a leading commodities tradi...

SQL Developer - Watford/NW London - £320 - £330 p/d - 6 months

£320 - £330 per day: Ashdown Group: The Ashdown Group have been engaged by a l...

Head of Audit

To £75,000 + Pension + Benefits + Bonus: Saxton Leigh: My client is looking f...

Day In a Page

Scottish referendum: The Yes vote was the love that dared speak its name, but it was not to be

Despite the result, this is the end of the status quo

Boyd Tonkin on the fall-out from the Scottish referendum
Manolo Blahnik: The high priest of heels talks flats, Englishness, and why he loves Mary Beard

Manolo Blahnik: Flats, Englishness, and Mary Beard

The shoe designer who has been dubbed 'the patron saint of the stiletto'
The Beatles biographer reveals exclusive original manuscripts of some of the best pop songs ever written

Scrambled eggs and LSD

Behind The Beatles' lyrics - thanks to Hunter Davis's original manuscript copies
'Normcore' fashion: Blending in is the new standing out in latest catwalk non-trend

'Normcore': Blending in is the new standing out

Just when fashion was in grave danger of running out of trends, it only went and invented the non-trend. Rebecca Gonsalves investigates
Dance’s new leading ladies fight back: How female vocalists are now writing their own hits

New leading ladies of dance fight back

How female vocalists are now writing their own hits
Mystery of the Ground Zero wedding photo

A shot in the dark

Mystery of the wedding photo from Ground Zero
His life, the universe and everything

His life, the universe and everything

New biography sheds light on comic genius of Douglas Adams
Save us from small screen superheroes

Save us from small screen superheroes

Shows like Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D are little more than marketing tools
Reach for the skies

Reach for the skies

From pools to football pitches, rooftop living is looking up
These are the 12 best hotel spas in the UK

12 best hotel spas in the UK

Some hotels go all out on facilities; others stand out for the sheer quality of treatments
These Iranian-controlled Shia militias used to specialise in killing American soldiers. Now they are fighting Isis, backed up by US airstrikes

Widespread fear of Isis is producing strange bedfellows

Iranian-controlled Shia militias that used to kill American soldiers are now fighting Isis, helped by US airstrikes
Topshop goes part Athena poster, part last spring Prada

Topshop goes part Athena poster, part last spring Prada

Shoppers don't come to Topshop for the unique
How to make a Lego masterpiece

How to make a Lego masterpiece

Toy breaks out of the nursery and heads for the gallery
Meet the ‘Endies’ – city dwellers who are too poor to have fun

Meet the ‘Endies’ – city dwellers who are too poor to have fun

Urbanites are cursed with an acronym pointing to Employed but No Disposable Income or Savings
Paisley’s decision to make peace with IRA enemies might remind the Arabs of Sadat

Ian Paisley’s decision to make peace with his IRA enemies

His Save Ulster from Sodomy campaign would surely have been supported by many a Sunni imam