Rogue Trader: Financial news in brief
Sunday 19 September 1999
* "Rumours of the death of polarisation turned out to be premature." Thank God for that.
* "Multi-ties are the established operating method in Australia." So always wear three ties when you are in Sydney.
* "None of us knows what the future holds." Death and taxes?
* "What does the average financial adviser do when he or she is not poring over a hot set of actuarial figures?" I wonder.
* A stunning riposte: "Well, all kinds of things, actually."
* Hot news from the streets: "McDonald's is probably the best-known franchise operation in the world."
* Good news for golf clubs: "A company director's ... duties are of an intermittent nature to be performed at periodical board meetings."
* "Today's workforce faces the fact that few jobs are for life. [More] people experience redundancy or frequent career changes. Part-time work is becoming common." You don't say!
* "The pressure is on life companies to show endowment policies offer good value." Or should that be rip-off?
* "83 of 145 broker pension funds and 81 out of 136 broker life funds decreased last year, while 19 of the 33 broker life and 26 of the 36 broker pension funds showed negative returns in the balanced fund category." Now say that when you're drunk.
- 1 Three of Pope Francis' relatives die in Argentina car crash, including two young great-nephews
- 2 Michael Brown shooting: Amnesty International sends team within US for first time as National Guard deployed
- 3 Here’s the damning letter Robin Williams wrote to his Mrs Doubtfire co-star's principal after they expelled her
- 4 Ferguson protests: 90-year-old Holocaust survivor Hedy Epstein ‘arrested’ by police during St Louis demonstrations
- 5 Cilla Black defends Cliff Richard: 'I am positive that the allegations are without foundation'
Syria conflict: President Assad finally turns on Isis as government steps up campaign against militant strongholds
Michael Brown shooting: Amnesty International sends team within US for first time as National Guard deployed
Ice Bucket Challenge: Lady Gaga, Justin Bieber and Oprah – the most entertaining reactions so far
Iraq crisis: Islamic State's message to America - 'We will drown you all in blood'
Ferguson: In the heartlands of America, a descent into madness
Isis threat: Cameron wants an alliance with Iran
Crisis? What crisis? A visiting US doctor gives the NHS a rave review
Ukip MEP calls for reintroduction of death penalty on fiftieth anniversary of last deaths
Russell Brand calls for Israel boycott: Comedian urges big businesses that 'facilitate the oppression of people in Gaza' to pull funding
Michael Brown shooting: Chaos erupts on the streets of Ferguson after autopsy shows teenager was shot six times – twice in the head
World peace? These are the only 11 countries in the world that are actually free from conflict
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