THE CHRISTMAS TURKEY AWARD

In the run-up to Christmas we will be presenting the Christmas Turkey Award for the most ridiculous seasonal merchandise.

This week's winner is Chocolate Chip Cheddar from Tesco. Designed to inject new life into festive cheeseboards, it is sold loose at the deli counter for pounds 3.29 per lb. It has the murky look of vanilla fudge spattered with drowned flies and tastes like bland, poor-quality mature Cheddar whose tang has been mysteriously blunted. The culprit is, of course, the lurking sweet chocolate chips.