Calvin Klein set sing Paddy's praises

LIBERAL DEMOCRATS IN BRIGHTON

This week has seen the rebirth of the Liberal Democrats as the authentic party of principle. Gone are the dark days of the Eighties when the two-party mould was to be broken by the forces of the sensible - if soggy - centre. Say hello, instead, to the party of sheet-anchors and bedrock, of radicalism and revolt, of tax and spend. Well a bit of tax (1p, if necessary, and a dollop from those few who earn 100 grand or more), and an awful lot of spend.

So happy have the Lib Dems been to cast off the tweeds of realism and don the Calvin Kleins of youthful enthusiasm that one middle-aged female delegate woke me up at four in the morning with "The Battle Hymn Of The Republic". So that's one vote less for bedrocks and anchors.

This will not disturb the happy homeward wend of delegates, sent on their way by an eternity of morale-boosting speeches by every senior party member who hadn't had a turn already - and quite a few who had. Alan, Archie, Jackie, Nichol, David, Shirl, Richard and Paddy all gave variations on the conference theme. Alan Beith's was particularly well-received. Three times he reiterated that, "with Liberal Democrats, you know where you are. This is what we stand for, this is what you will get". It reminded me of Yul Brynner as Pharaoh Rameses in The Ten Commandments, "so let it be written, so let it be done". It sounded good in 1200BC, and it sounds good today. It also happens to be bollocks.

For, like all modern parties, the Lib Dems are a coalition of folk with varying views and preoccupations, whose need to appeal to different sections of the electorate can lead to marked changes in emphasis. In Parliament, this is the party of moor, tor and shore, competing with the Tories for the tourist traps of the West Country, the Scottish countryside and the seaside towns of the South Coast. But growing sections see themselves as champ- ions of the urban poor and underclass. These are two very difficult horses to ride simultaneously. Re- distribution will require taking dosh from the sedate burghers of Newbury and doling it out to the crack-maddened denizens of Hackney. It won't be popular. Nor is the relationship with Labour in any way resolved. David Rendel MP spoke of the inevitable failure of a Blair government, and the opportunities for urban swath-cutting this would entail. It was one of the narrowest, most parochial and depressing speeches I have heard. Up spake Shirley. Having arrived characteristically late for the conference, she had been walking around all morning in that odd mixture of shuffle and bustle. Far from looking forward to a Labour disaster, she was hoping for a Lib Dem-inspired "great, reforming administration", which, of course, Tony Blair would have to lead.

This divergence may explain an extraordinary passage in Paddy's closing oration. He had "learned many lessons". The first was that, in the exercise of power, "rule nothing out. Rule nothing in. Keep all your options open." The second, was that "to earn trust you must be clear about your policies and clear about your principles". Expect T. Blair to say exactly the same next week.