Football: Far from home

Ten things that Derby County's Costa Rican Paulo Wanchope might be missing today
1 Butterflies. Costa Rica has more than 750 exotic varieties.

2 A cup of Dorado. Coffee is the major product of the "Rich Coast".

3 The "eternal spring" climate of San Jose: 85 degrees year round and sunny. Much like Derby's, really, with warmth and sunshine added.

4 Gallo pinto (literally "speckled rooster"), the national staple dish of rice and beans.

5 Rainforests with parrots, monkeys, iguanas, pumas and the unique golden toad, said to resemble Jim Smith but with only two chins.

6 Bullfighting: a compassionate variety, in which bulls are never killed.

7 Guaro, the local firewater. The strongest home-brew varieties act as aphrodisiacs to those they don't kill.

8 Playa Uva, a glorious surfing beach.

9 The Arenal volcano, whose red-hot rock showers illuminate the night sky, rather like the Pride Park floodlights (except when Wimbledon visit).

10 Earthquakes.