Games: don't junk it - use it

From one side, this week's object (pictured opposite) may look like any old cow suspended in formaldehyde, but if you wander round the back, you will see that the cow has been sliced in half.

Yes, for little more than the price of two toy cows (I found mine at an Early Learning Centre; pounds 1.66 for the large one, 75p for the calf) and a small hacksaw, you can make your own Damien Hirst.

Having shepherded the cows home (make sure your cows are standing - it doesn't work half as well with sitting ones), you must slice them in two vertically. I was disappointed to find that Early Learning Centre Cows have no entrails, but for pounds 1.66 what can you expect? Now all you need is two transparent plastic drink bottles - two litre and 11/2 litre capacity should be about right. Slake your Damien thirst by drinking their contents, then slice off two portions that may be squashed into suitable rectangular cow containers. The full cow-in-formaldehyde effect may be achieved by the judicious suspension of the hemi-beast from the roof of its container by Selotape.

Final tip: when shopping for a suitable cow, the word "splanchnic" may come in useful. It means pertaining to the entrails.