The IoS Awards: Let's hear it for the people and the moments that we'll really treasure

From Joan Rivers to the Queen's corgis, all shall have prizes (though they might not want them...)


CALLING OF THE YEAR

George Bush allegedly told two Palestinian politicians, "I am driven with a mission from God. God would tell me, 'George, go and fight those terrorists in Afghanistan'. And I did," he explained. "And then God would tell me, 'George, go and end the tyranny in Iraq'. And I did. And, now again, I feel God's words coming to me, 'Go and get the Palestinians their state and get the Israelis their security and get peace in the Middle East'. And by God, I'm gonna do it." God did not comment on the allegations.

BABY OF THE YEAR

A hotly contested position. Charles Kennedy's son Donald arrived with disastrous timing in April, causing his father to take time off from election campaigning and almost to fall asleep at the LibDems' manifesto launch. Scientologists Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes announced the imminent arrival of their own first child, who will be delivered in silence, despite the mother having sworn to remain a virgin until her wedding night. The most surprising pregnancy was Bridget Jones's. Surprising most of all to Bridget, and to the baby's two fathers.

TRAGIC ANIMAL STORY OF THE YEAR

Roman Abramovich's parrot found it was persona non grata in New Zealand in November, when it attempted to enter the country without its paperwork. Abramovich's yacht was forced to weigh anchor off the coast of Tonga, because officials could not be sure his African Grey was clear of bird flu. Rest assured that the Queen's corgis travelled in comfort, after she rejected a new £80,000 Daimler Super Eight Jaguar limousine because its parcel shelf was not big enough for her little darlings.

UNIVERSITY OF THE BLINDINGLY OBVIOUS STUDY OF THE YEAR

Which revealed that men who are insecure about their masculinity are more likely to buy a big car. "Masculinity-threatened men also reported feeling more ashamed, guilty, upset and hostile," reported Cornell University. "When women were told they had masculine traits their attitudes did not change as a result."

ROW OF THE YEAR

It was a close-run thing. George Michael and Elton John started well with a fight that John later described as "handbags at 50 paces". Then George Galloway tipped the balance by describing Christopher Hitchens as a "drink-soaked, former Trotskyist popinjay". But in October, Joan Rivers and Darcus Howe turned the air blue on Libby Purves's normally genteel Radio 4 show, Midweek. "Don't you dare call me a racist ... son of a bitch!" spat Rivers. Purves eventually salvaged the conversation by turning in panic to a nearby plant photographer.

STORM IN A D-CUP OF THE YEAR

Peter Mandelson probably never imagined he would become embroiled in bra wars. But that is exactly what happened to the EU Trade Commissioner when 85 million bras, jumpers and other Chinese-made gar-ments were held in temporary confinement in European warehouses after a row about quotas. Many retailers including Marks & Spencer, were forced to turn to alternative suppliers during the crisis.

OVERREACTION OF THE YEAR

Bluewater shopping centre received the support of John Prescott - and the scorn of the rest of Britain - when it banned teenagers wearing hoodies from its premises. Prescott said that he, too, had felt "intimidated" when he was approached last year by "about 10 kids wearing hoods, you know, these covers with hoods on". Others were reminded of famous hood-wearers from history, including Mother Teresa. And Jesus.

HOTPANTS OF THE YEAR

A pair of tasselled, gold hotpants worn by Kylie Minogue in her 2000 video for Spinning Around have been insured for £1m. The hotpants went on display in January in an exhibition of Kylie memorabilia in Melbourne. They are being kept in a bulletproof display case and there are guards on duty around the clock to protect the tiny knickers from thieves.

ABOUT-TURN OF THE YEAR

Which legendary feminist academic once icily described watching Big Brother as "about as dignified as looking through the keyhole in your teenage child's bedroom door. To do it occasionally would be shameful, to get hooked on it is downright depraved"? Yes, that would have been Germaine Greer, who appeared in Celebrity Big Brother in January with John McCririck, Jackie Stallone and others. She lasted five days before walking out.

FASHION GAFFE OF THE YEAR

You know those times when you really regret coming in fancy dress? Prince Harry had one of those weeks after wearing a Nazi uniform to the party for some of his friends, a few days before his family led events to mark the 60th anniversary of the liberation of Auschwitz. "I am very sorry if I caused offence or embarrassment to anyone," he said later. "It was a poor choice of costume." By contrast, Prince William's skin-tight leopard outfit seemed a roaring success.

Start your day with The Independent, sign up for daily news emails
Arts and Entertainment
Supporting role: at the Supreme Court, Rhodes was accompanied by a famous friend, the actor Benedict Cumberbatch
booksPianist James Rhodes on the extraordinary legal battle to stop the injunction of his memoirs
Arts and Entertainment
Jesuthasan Antonythasan as Dheepan
filmDheepan, film review
Sport
Steven Gerrard scores for Liverpool
sport
News
Tattoo enthusiast Cammy Stewart poses for a portrait during the Great British Tattoo Show
In picturesThe Great British Tattoo Show
Have you tried new the Independent Digital Edition apps?
News
ebookA unique anthology of reporting and analysis of a crucial period of history
Latest stories from i100
Have you tried new the Independent Digital Edition apps?
Independent Dating
and  

By clicking 'Search' you
are agreeing to our
Terms of Use.

iJobs Job Widget
iJobs Media

Guru Careers: Software Developer / C# Developer

£40-50K: Guru Careers: We are seeking an experienced Software / C# Developer w...

Guru Careers: Software Developer

£35 - 40k + Benefits: Guru Careers: We are seeking a Software Developer (JavaS...

Guru Careers: Senior Account Manager / SAM

£30 - 35k: Guru Careers: A Senior Account Manager / SAM is needed to join the ...

Ashdown Group: Digital Marketing Manager (EMEA) - City, London

£55000 - £65000 per annum + Benefits: Ashdown Group: Digital Marketing Manager...

Day In a Page

Sun, sex and an anthropological study: One British academic's summer of hell in Magaluf

Sun, sex and an anthropological study

One academic’s summer of hell in Magaluf
From Shakespeare to Rising Damp... to Vicious

Frances de la Tour's 50-year triumph

'Rising Damp' brought De la Tour such recognition that she could be forgiven if she'd never been able to move on. But at 70, she continues to flourish - and to beguile
'That Whitsun, I was late getting away...'

Ian McMillan on the Whitsun Weddings

This weekend is Whitsun, and while the festival may no longer resonate, Larkin's best-loved poem, lives on - along with the train journey at the heart of it
Kathryn Williams explores the works and influences of Sylvia Plath in a new light

Songs from the bell jar

Kathryn Williams explores the works and influences of Sylvia Plath
How one man's day in high heels showed him that Cannes must change its 'no flats' policy

One man's day in high heels

...showed him that Cannes must change its 'flats' policy
Is a quiet crusade to reform executive pay bearing fruit?

Is a quiet crusade to reform executive pay bearing fruit?

Dominic Rossi of Fidelity says his pressure on business to control rewards is working. But why aren’t other fund managers helping?
The King David Hotel gives precious work to Palestinians - unless peace talks are on

King David Hotel: Palestinians not included

The King David is special to Jerusalem. Nick Kochan checked in and discovered it has some special arrangements, too
More people moving from Australia to New Zealand than in the other direction for first time in 24 years

End of the Aussie brain drain

More people moving from Australia to New Zealand than in the other direction for first time in 24 years
Meditation is touted as a cure for mental instability but can it actually be bad for you?

Can meditation be bad for you?

Researching a mass murder, Dr Miguel Farias discovered that, far from bringing inner peace, meditation can leave devotees in pieces
Eurovision 2015: Australians will be cheering on their first-ever entrant this Saturday

Australia's first-ever Eurovision entrant

Australia, a nation of kitsch-worshippers, has always loved the Eurovision Song Contest. Maggie Alderson says it'll fit in fine
Letterman's final Late Show: Laughter, but no tears, as David takes his bow after 33 years

Laughter, but no tears, as Letterman takes his bow after 33 years

Veteran talkshow host steps down to plaudits from four presidents
Ivor Novello Awards 2015: Hozier wins with anti-Catholic song 'Take Me To Church' as John Whittingdale leads praise for Black Sabbath

Hozier's 'blasphemous' song takes Novello award

Singer joins Ed Sheeran and Clean Bandit in celebration of the best in British and Irish music
Tequila gold rush: The spirit has gone from a cheap shot to a multi-billion pound product

Join the tequila gold rush

The spirit has gone from a cheap shot to a multi-billion pound product
12 best statement wallpapers

12 best statement wallpapers

Make an impact and transform a room with a conversation-starting pattern
Paul Scholes column: Does David De Gea really want to leave Manchester United to fight it out for the No 1 spot at Real Madrid?

Paul Scholes column

Does David De Gea really want to leave Manchester United to fight it out for the No 1 spot at Real Madrid?