Parliament - The Sketch: Members are all talk when it comes to the big question
But when you really hope MPs will misbehave they almost invariably don't - and this is never truer than when word has gone round that an MP appears to have been caught misbehaving outside the House.
Yesterday, for example, many of the conversations in the corridors will have touched on the weekend's exciting revelation that a Labour MP had been found on the premises when the police raided a Thai massage parlour.
Certainly journalists were talking about it and while I don't wish to libel elected representatives, than whom no higher-minded body of people exist, I think it is fair to say that the odd member might have mentioned it - plus most of the even ones as well.
For journalists facing the prospect of Jack Straw answering questions about the public information campaign on the voting system for the European elections, this naturally offered a distant shimmer of hope. Crawling across the burning sands of employment statistics for West Mercia police force for the year 1998 to 1999, we were heartened by the sight of palm trees far away on the horizon.
If we could just make it to Question 11, an inquiry from Jenny Jones about what plans Mr Straw had to review the law on kerb crawling, surely the innuendo-drought would break.
Someone would make a sly joke and we could plunge gratefully into the mud-hole, cackling hysterically as we slaked our thirsts. Not a bit of it. The question could hardly have been more pertinent, really.
Ms jones wished to raise the anomalies in the existing laws on prostitution, which apparently make kerb-crawling an offence though not yet an arrestable one. She was also concerned to shift the full weight of the law off prostitutes' shoulders and onto those of their male exploiters, both pimp and client.
This was the right moment to do it but even so she may have regretted that the ballot had put her question so far up the order paper.
Paul Boateng took a different tack, halting his vehicle and decorating the outside with outraged banners: the Government would be considering how best to deal with "those who ply this evil trade," he said. The sentiments were unimpeachable and the Victorian high style rather pertinent, since he was talking about child prostitution, but Mr Boateng's moral indignation is too opportunistic to be entirely convincing anymore. Tyres squealing, he too headed off for a more respectable neighbourhood. Tory MPs, perhaps aware that once mud starts getting thrown there's no knowing who might get splashed, sat uncharacteristically silent.
There was still a faint hope of executive relief - as luck would have it the MP for Northampton North, Sally Keeble, also had a question on the order paper. She wanted to know what steps Mr Straw was taking to reduce crime in shopping centres, to which one obvious answer might be that her local police force could spend less time in local massage parlours and more time patrolling the streets. There was a rather sarcastic "hear, hear" from Nicholas Soames when Mr Boateng finished his scrupulously bland response, but not a hint otherwise that most members were trying to keep a straight face.
They had all opted for what you might call the Fawlty gambit - whatever you do, don't mention the whore.
Emergency call 'started off dumb, but got pretty serious'
Britain First criticised for using actress's memory to draw attention to their 'hate-filled home page'
Thought you'd seen it all after the Jeremy Paxman interview?
Greatest mystery about the hit BBC1 show is how it continues to be made at all, writes Grace Dent
"History is violent," says the US Army tank commander Don "Wardaddy" Collier
Animal welfare charities have urged the boy band to cut the scenes
Argentinian scored 'rabona' wonder goal for Tottenham in Europa League – see it here
- 1 This 'woman calls police to order pizza' story isn't going where you're expecting
- 2 Watch what happened when food critics were unknowingly served McDonald's
- 3 Jimmy Carr's controversial Oscar Pistorius joke goes a bit too far at the Q Awards
- 4 Ottawa shootings: Bruce MacKinnon's cartoon is the perfect tribute to soldier Nathan Cirillo
- 5 Of course, teenage girls need role models – but not like beauty vlogger Zoella
Isis releases first video showing the stoning of woman accused of committing adultery as her father shouts 'don't call me Dad'
This 'woman calls police to order pizza' story isn't going where you're expecting
FCKH8: YouTube reinstates provocative anti-sexism video showing young girls swearing
Diwali: What is the festival of lights – and how is it celebrated around the world?
Jimmy Carr's controversial Oscar Pistorius joke goes a bit too far at the Q Awards
Of course, teenage girls need role models – but not like beauty vlogger Zoella
Cameron is warned 'no possibility' of UK reducing immigration and that bid to bring in quota on migrant workers would be illegal
Support for EU membership 'at highest level since 1991' with most Brits wanting to stay 'in'
Thousands with degenerative conditions classified as 'fit to work in future' – despite no possibility of improvement
Residents should throw a street party and mix with immigrant neighbours, councils told
Attacks on 'Ukip Calypso' show how skewed people’s priorities are
£350 Per Day: Clearwater People Solutions Ltd: Our client based in Reading are...
Highly Attractive Package: Austen Lloyd: A VERY HIGH QUALITY FIRM - A high q...
competitive + bonus + benefits: Sauce Recruitment: Are you the king or Queen o...
£10 per hour: Randstad Education Chelmsford: Are you an experienced note taker...