‘Chocolate hob nobs or choc digestives?’ and other hard-hitting questions tackled by Boris Johnson on Twitter today

The Mayor of London really got to the core of the city’s issues in his last #AskBoris Q&A of 2013

The Mayor of London really got to the core of the city’s issues in his last #AskBorris Q&A of 2013 (Getty)

You can always count on Boris Johnson ˗ if not to cap rising Tube fares, reduce crime and build more housing ˗ to make a bit of a buffoon of himself.

On a grey and dreary Friday 13th – the very same day he unveiled an expansion of his bike hire scheme to south-west London – that’s exactly what the Mayor of London’s last #AskBoris Twitter Q&A did. And we can’t think of any better way to spend our council taxes than that.

Sure, there were a couple of serious queries thrown in to avoid the whole thing resembling a Smash Hits “if you were a sandwich filling, what would you be and why?” inquisition circa 1995.

But here are our personal favourite answers to those all-important questions plaguing the minds of Londoners this afternoon:

1. The great biscuit debate

Q: @willboot1987: “Chocolate hob nobs or choc digestives? @MayorofLondon #AskBoris”

A: @MayorofLondon: “Every chocolate hobnob in the world is made in Harlesden - and i am going there i hope next year! #askboris @willboot1987”

2. The ambiguous animal query

Q: @E_Gathercol: “What does the fox say? @MayorofLondon #AskBoris”

A: @MayorofLondon: “hen de hepistamai mega is what the fox says #askboris @E_Gathercole”

3. The nonsensical Victorian riddle

Q: @SpoiltVictorian: “#askboris Who put the ram in the ram-a-lam-a-ding-dong?”

A: @MayorOfLondon: “the same person who put the bom in the bom she bom she bom i expect #askboris @SpoiltVictorian”

4. The prawn incident on the west bound central line

Q: AlasdairCV: “@MayorofLondon there is a waft of garlic prawns on west bound central line, between ox circus and bond str. Can we investigate? #AskBoris”

A: @MayorofLondon: “our garlic prawn squad will be on it asap Alastair ...London underground has noted your complaint #askboris @alastaircv”

5. The inner Gallic pondering

Q: @realander: “@MayorofLondon Deep down, do you wish you were the mayor of Paris instead? #AskBoris”

A: @MayorofLondon: “of course not! i am already the mayor of the 6th biggest French city on earth #askboris @realander”

6. The honey monster comparison

Q: @shad0w_m0ses: “#AskBoris @MayorofLondon You remind me of the honey monster, do you see a resemblance?”

A: @MajorofLondon: “Did you know that every Sugar puff in the world comes from Southall London, home of the honey monster? #askboris @shad0w__m0ses”