The 5-minute Interview: Joanne Harris, author

'I used to be an accountant. It was hell. It didn't last very long'

'If you want something you can have it but you have to do some work. It's the ethic my mother brought me up with' (Tom Pilston)

Harris, 44, is the best-selling author of 'Chocolat'. Her latest novel, 'The Lollipop Shoes', will be available in paperback from 21 April

If I weren't talking to you right now I'd be...

The boring answer is probably doing some work. No, actually I would probably be boiling potatoes for my 14-year-old daughter. She's a carbohydrate junkie.

A phrase I use far too often...

"That totally kicks ass." Again, my daughter's fault. If I am in a particularly ironic mood, that phrase ends with "dude".

I wish people would take more notice of...

What they drop on the floor. When I go for walks I carry a plastic bag so I can pick up litter.

The most surprising thing that happened to me was...

Surprising things happen to me every day. Recently, I would say being invited to Windsor Castle for the state visit of the French President. I was in a permanent state of surprise – and I was the only person not wearing a tiara.

A common misperception of me is...

There are so many but the most common is about chocolate. People give it to me all the time, but I never eat it. I am not at all a chocoholic. I would rather eat anchovy toast.

I am not a politician but...

I am not sure there is a "but", but I am a radical something. Possibly, a radically loose cannon.

I'm good at...

Procrastinating. I have an advanced degree in procrastination and another one in paranoia.

I'm very bad at...

Maths. Anything to do with numbers at all. Anniversaries, birthdays, I always forget them. The funny thing is I used to be an accountant. It was hell. It didn't last long.

The ideal night out is...

A night in with my husband and daughter. We make popcorn and watch movies. We go through phases – right now its Korean horror films.

In moments of weakness I...

Hide under the duvet and probably eat – sometimes at the same time.

You know me as a writer but in another life, I'd have been...

A beachcomber. I'd collect rubbish from the water's edge, make it into art and sell it to the Tate Modern.

The best age to be is...

This age – whatever "this" is now. Anything else is too sad to contemplate.

In a nutshell, my philosophy is this...

If you want something you can have it but you have to do some work. It's the ethic my mother brought me up with.

Michelle MacNeill