1: Rubber cutlery grips
With the domestic style revolution of the Sixties, sleek steel cutlery quickly replaced old-fashioned wood and bone handled knives and forks on the British dinner table. Although the new Scandinavian designs sat well with pine furniture and white tableware, a polished silver handle is not always the easiest of tools to eat with. All too often a knife or fork would suddenly slip from the hand, causing embarrassment for everyone. But, thanks to Rubberhold, such mealtime calamities are a thing of the past. Rubberhold are non-slip rubber grips that fit neatly and discreetly over all major brands of modern cutlery. They come in a choice of three colours: red, scarlet and cherry. £34 for a set of six.
2: Neck tie protector
A new tie! So often this sartorial item is a cherished birthday or Christmas gift. Then again, it may be one that you have bought yourself after having gone to a lot of valuable time and trouble to find just the right colour and pattern. Disaster, then, to see that salad dressing or some other oily substance has stained it. And it's worse still if you are eating out, with not the remotest chance of removing the offending stain. But help is hand. Technicians at Norwegian Tie Laboratory in Oslo have produced a simple solution - Cravat-Protect. These are totally transparent sheets of food-absorbent fabric which you iron directly on to the face of your tie. When unwanted food or beverage appears, they can be instantly peeled off, leaving your tie looking brand spanking new. Each packet of Cravat-Protect contains 10 easy-to-peel sheets. £19. 95.
3: Travelling garden furniture cleaning kit
It's holiday time! There you are in a rented apartment by the sea or a delightful villa in the country. Yet it can be so easily ruined by the discovery that the garden furniture has not been properly cleaned. The owners have put fresh linen on the bed and the shower room is spotless. But, oh dear. Here's a dirty pool lounger and there's an umbrella that could do with a good wipe down.
That's when the Exterior Travel Care Kit from Voyagercleanse, the portable travel cleaning experts, is worth its weight in gold. The handy-sized kit fits into most extra large suitcases and contains a selection of brushes, cloths, sponges and liquid cleansers. £98.
4: Wind-up razor
Not long ago we all greeted the wind-up radio as a breakthrough in communications technology. For millions of people who have no access to electricity, the marvel of the wireless was finally theirs. Not surprisingly, people who can now happily tune in to the airwaves have gone in
search of other wind-up versions of electrical gadgets to enhance their lifestyle, be it in the jungle, the desert or up a mountain. They need look no more. From Klokwork in Belgrade comes Shave-Anywhere, the wind-up razor. A few turns of the key and hey presto! There's enough power for week of perfect shaves. £187.
5: Auto wheelie bin navigator
Whether we like them or not, the ubiquitous wheelie bin is here to stay. But for all its use as a purpose-built household waste container, there are drawbacks. How often on a cold winter's night, just as you turn out the light, has the thought struck you - I forgot to put out the wheelie? Dressed in your pyjamas, with temperatures dropping to below freezing, no wonder you leave it where it is and end up with two weeks' refuse to cope with. But all that's history with Autowheelie, a new hi-tech navigational device from North Korea. Once connected, you can guide your wheelie to the front gate from the comfort your home - even from your bed! £674. 99.
6: Illuminated golf outfit
Fed up with hanging around the fairways for your shot to the 13th hole? Tired of having to queue just to get on the green? Then why not play golf at night, when the course is empty? Impossible? Not with the latest brainwave from Golf Krazy. The Idaho-based company has brought out the perfect solution to night time swingers and putters - Illumogolf. Everything a golfer needs is illuminated - clubs, balls, flags, even the pencil and score card (but obviously not the caddy). £2,332.
7: Fridge oven
With large houses priced out of most people's reach, a small flat is often the only choice. And small flats unfortunately mean small kitchens. Where do I put the oven? Where do I put the fridge? Now, thanks to the wonderful ideas team at Kitch-Kitchens, you can have a fridge and oven all in one and save that all-too valuable kitchen space. With a touch of a button, Frig-Oven will ensure your Sunday roast turns ice cold in a matter of minutes.
And press again et voilà! Frozen beef is piping hot. Frig-Oven comes in a range of two sizes, mini and small, and a selection of colours, off-white, chalk and light stone. £236.
8: Vinyl converter
The news on the block is that vinyl is back - big time. For years our old vinyl treasures have been gathering dust in the attic or given to Oxfam. First tapes, then CDs and downloads have taken centre stage in the domestic music centre. But now vinyl is fighting back, and with spectacular success. The problem is that the music we want is on systems we don't want. Not any more. Thanks to the Vinyl Converter XX300, you can transfer your Abba collection and Mozart's theme from Elvira Madigan back on to blank vinyl discs in a matter of minutes. The Vinyl Converter XX300 comes complete with 50 blank discs and cardboard sleeves. And there is an optional printing kit for sleeve designs and liner notes. £4,330.
9: Solar-powered cigarette lighter
Solar energy is all the rage, and why not? It is free and safe to use. So what can be more user and environmentally friendly than Solarlight, the solar-powered cigarette lighter? Once fully charged (this takes a couple of weeks of exposure to bright sunshine) Solarlight will ignite 600 packets of your favourite brand. It will also light most pipes. £26.59.
10: GM privet
There is a lot of discussion about the pros and cons of genetically modified products such as tomatoes and wheat crops. But there can be no one, surely, who would find fault with a privet hedge that can be grown to the height you want and never needs trimming. And that's just what Willgrow, the world's biggest GM research centre, in Lima, Ohio, has come up with. Its GM Perfect Privet can be grown to within centimetres of your desired specification. All you have to do is plant the seeds and let science do the rest. £88 buys seeds for a hedge two metres high by one metre wide by four metres long.
Barry Fantoni adds: I began writing Private Eye's Gnomemart gift guide with Richard Ingrams roughly 30 years ago. Our first effort filled a page and had about 12 items. Since then, to my certain knowledge, two of our ideas have been turned into actual products. There is a pair of wellingtons with lights in the toes so you can see where you are going in the dark. And another night-time aid, a pen with a bulb in the end to allow you to write in the dark, has also found its way into the shops.Reuse content