On the Front Foot: Aussie Rules is the only way to hide the fact Aussies don't rule

Ashes fever may be gripping the nation but it is far from an exclusive concern. In this neck of the woods, Aussie Rules rules. To anybody outside this country, it is a mysterious game involving an oval ball played by large men wearing coloured vests. It is not rugby. Like baseball, it is probably impossible to explain to somebody who has not grown up with it, and like baseball the world champions always come from one country because, basically, it is played in only one country. Indeed, though football as we know it is played all round the world, they quaintly insist on referring to their own arcane game as footy. The Australian Football League have been slick in marketing the game and there is a regular diet of stories in the tabloids involving players misbehaving. So, with Australia's cricketers in disarray as the First Test looms, it was more important still to remove cricket from the back pages last week. The AFL draft could not have been more timely. This is the occasion each close season when all the AFL clubs are allowed to pick talented young players from a long list. The first draft is usually awarded to the previous season's bottom club. There was much excitement in Tasmania about three of their youngsters being plucked from obscurity to join big mainland clubs. But that was outdone by the signing for the second-tier Tasmanian State League of the AFL legend Jason Akermanis. He regularly courts controversy, most recently by suggesting that gay footy players should stay in the closet. All this was enough to deflect attention from Australia's cricketers having a dreadful time of it in the final Sheffield Shield matches before the Ashes. Nor did cricket help itself by staging a showbiz event in pouring rain at Sydney Harbour to announce Australia's squad for the First Test. It consisted of 17 names and was watched by two men and a dog, who could consider themselves unfortunate not to be picked.

Reporting for England duty

In a spirit of camaraderie, the England players helped to run a training session for the travelling reporters last week. Doubtless their friendly co-operation was fuelled by the team sponsors, Brit Insurance, but it still reflected well on all concerned. It was recorded for posterity by Graeme Swann, in his entertaining video diary for the ECB website. What larks the players had seeing their bloated, red-faced critics trying to duplicate their training sessions with bat, ball and in the field. But what sympathy coach Andy Flower and his staff showed their charges. There were pats on the back all round. Such an event could have happened in no other top-level sport.

Kasprowicz is a turn-coat too

Leaving no stone unturned in their quest for Ashes glory, England understandably will hire any expert available. Hence the bowling coach is David Saker, an affable Victorian seemingly happy to propel Jimmy Anderson et al to defeat his compatriots. And then there is Mike Kasprowicz, the highly popular former Test fast bowler (and last out in the heart-stopping match at Edgbaston in 2005). He has been helping the England Performance Programme bowlers in Brisbane. But he is also the new president of the Australian Cricketers' Association. Nice that the oldest enemies can be so friendly.

Another fine mess, Kev

Kevin Pietersen, bless him, is to be congratulated on growing his moustache for charity in what is now known as Movember. But he is aware that it is not quite the real deal – he has scant growth on the side of his mouth. He resembles more and more the great silent screen comic Oliver Hardy.

s.brenkley@independent.co.uk