Matt Holland: Two howlers to start – and more later on

This has been a dreadful start to the Euro 2004 qualifiers for the Republic and even as we headed back to the hotel last night I could not believe that, in such an open game, we had lost by two goals.

Our manager, Mick McCarthy, said afterwards that he could not fault the effort, but when you see some of the sloppy mistakes that gifted them goals, you realise that effort is not enough. Away from home you want to start tight and disciplined to try and quiet the home fans. We were two down inside 25 minutes and, even though we must credit the young Russian side for their performance and the way they took the game right to us, we suffered through our own errors.

At half-time we felt we had a chance and altered our shape to 3-4-3 to attack more. Goodness me, we had chances and, with plenty of time left, we scored, so a draw was a realistic aim.

But to compound our earlier errors we gifted another goal only seconds later. It's exasperating that, when we looked like salvaging the game, we threw it away again.

During our training and preparation back in Dublin we played a full match against the Under-21s, who lined up exactly the same as the Russians had in last month's friendly against Sweden – so we knew they used three centre-backs and two wing-backs. All the information is useless, however, if you don't provide stability in defence and I don't think we defended well as a unit.

Two down so early on is unforgivable and left our preparations for how to defend against their style of attack and how to break down their defence irrelevant. We were chasing the game, which meant we were leaving ourselves open to counter-attack – and that is exactly how the Russians finished us off.

We knew they were a threat because on Friday evening we had studied the video of their friendly and, although it finished a 1-1 draw, the general consensus around the room was that the Russians should have won. They created lots of chances and looked a real danger going forward.

Even so, we still considered ourselves favourites, especially as we had the good fortune to be visiting Moscow when the climate was temperate rather than in the freezing depths of their winter. And, for all the talk of smog and smoke covering the city, I hardly noticed anything. The biggest cloud was over the team bus on the journey back from the stadium.

Any euphoria that was hanging over from the World Cup has certainly been banished now as we realise that we have a hard scrap to win the group. There was a definite "sleeves rolled up, let's get on with the business" attitude before this game and I think it will get more grim and determined now we have lost. Maybe it will benefit us, as we seem to revel in the underdog and underrated role.

Unusually for a bunch of guys with such good camaraderie, the whole week was very serious. Even the infamous "yellow jersey", that has not been washed for years, stinks worse than a camel's breath and is awarded to the worst player during the five-a-side sessions, has started to take on a political slant. Poor old Ian Harte had to wear it after the players voted him the dunce and yet, in my view, he was not even in the bottom five. Some who were, though, spent a lot of time huddled at the back of the bus, so I fear the dreaded stench had caused a few to adopt tactical voting. I shall name no names, yet, but will keep more than a beady eye on some of them.

At least there was no dispute when our goalkeeper, Shay Given, was awarded it. His first touch in a "below-head-height five-a-side" was a hoof to the forwards which endangered passing aircraft.

"Yellow" was the cry from one and all before the ball had even landed. "What? Why?" But his protestations fell on deaf ears.

Goalkeepers. Can't win without them, can't explain anything to them. Truly a breed apart.

I think the lads will reflect on this loss and start to remember how much we enjoyed the buzz of the World Cup and how desperate we are to be involved in the next big tournament.

This is one result, a very bad one, admittedly, but the situation is retrievable. It does put us under pressure, something we have dealt with before, but this bunch of players have a lot of character and strength. Looks like we will need them displayed in full again.

The silly errors will continue to be punished if we keep making them. Professional sport is a complicated affair but, when distilled down into its simplest, one of the biggest elements is to cut out errors. We need to get that most basic part right if we are to top the group.

Matt Holland, the Republic of Ireland international, was talking to Iain Fletcher