Dance: Event Of The Week - Pina Bausch

Pina Bausch from Wed

Preview: Comedy - Steve Coogan

In his new show, The Man Who Thinks He's It, the character comedian Steve Coogan (above) will be treating us to his Manchester hoolies, Paul and Pauline Calf, and the smoothie singer, Tony Ferrino. But his finest creation remains the monstrous chat-show host, Alan Partridge. Against all odds, people lap him up. "Even though he's a berk, people like him despite themselves," Coogan says. "The Little Englander in him is in all of us. He gives vent to those things we'd all like to say but daren't. He's a mirror showing us our own hideousness."

BOX OFFICE: FIRST CALL LAST CALL

Booking has just commenced for the opening show of the RSC's autumn season at the Barbican, The School for Scandal. Sheridan's comedy of manners, which sees an uncle disguising himself in a bid to test the virtue of his nephews, is directed Declan Donnellan, and designed by Nick Ormerod, both formerly of Cheek By Jowl. Add a cast that includes Kenneth Cranham, Emma Fielding and Celia Imrie, and you can be sure that tickets will not hang around.

See Forkbeard Fantasy

The wonderfully inventive Forkbeard Fantasy who delighted audiences last year with The Fall of the House of the Usherettes return to the Lyric Studio with their new show The Barbers of Surreal (left) from 2 March. Set in a beauty parlour where the traditional skills of hairdressing have been enhanced by recent breakthroughs in genetic engineering, the piece promises to take the company to new heights of lunacy. Just why, for example, is the Egg Shampoo behaving strangely? The yolk, will no doubt be on you.

Items and Icons: In the kitchen (2)

Utensils have come a long way since your mother's Prestige pressure cooker. Aoife O'Riordain selects three pages of the most covetable kitchen kit. Photographs by William Taylor

THEATRE Measure for Measure Royal Lyceum Theatre

Stephane Braunschweig's staging of Measure for Measure is dominated by a huge drum-revolve. To create a change of scene, the characters have to push it round effortfully. It looks like back-breaking work - a recurrent spectacle that, as the evening wears on, increasingly seems to emblematise this grotesquely laboured account of Shakespeare's trickiest problem comedy.

Music hall star dies aged 71

Margery Manners, one of Britain's best-loved music hall and variety performers, died yesterday, aged 71. In a career that spanned more than 50 years, she topped bills across the UK, played the London Palladium many times.

Letter: Tories to blame for the beggars' plight

Sir: I would heartily agree with Suzanne Moore's article on safer streets (8 January). We need a better, richer street life.

Hot tickets; Today's ticket offer: Brothers of the Brush

Today's ticket offer

Letter: The money for the Baylis dream

Sir: Peggy England (letter, 29 February) queried the costs of running Sadler's Wells and suggested that in the 1930s all the money came from the box office. This is not so. Lilian Baylis struggled against all the odds to keep Sadler's Wells open, while many artists worked for love or little better to keep her dream alive. Major public appeals were mounted in the 1930s to build the Sadler's Wells Theatre and clear later debts.

and what's more...

Hands up who remembers Uri Geller, the man who brought a new meaning to the word "spooning"?. The world's most famous "psychokinetic expert" will be appearing on stage for the first time in five years at the Cambridge Theatre on Sunday in order to raise money for Workers for Wishes, a kind of Jewish Jim'll Fix It for those living in residential care. The evening, compered by Jeremy Beadle, also includes the final of "Jewish Performer of the Year". Prepare for Vanessa Feltz gags. Booking:

TICKET OFFER: THE SENSUALIST

The Pilgrim Theatre Company gives Guy de Maupassant's The Sensualist a welcome shot in the arm at The Arts Theatre, Great Newport Street, London WC2. The play portrays a ruthless manipulator sleeping his way up the social ranks. Yet, with de Maupassant appearing as a character on the sidelines, the production highlights the dichotomy between his creation's unfettered enjoyment of life and the writer's own painful death from syphilis.

TICKET OFFER: GRAND CEREMONIAL

The Grand Ceremonial, a grotesque comedy/thriller from Spanish playwright Fernando Arrabal, receives its British premiere tonight at the 606 Theatre. A cross between Lewis Carroll and the Marquis de Sade, the Grand Ceremonial is an extraordinary vision of eroticism, excess and vertigo from one of the most controversial figures in European theatre. The play runs until 15 July at the Lyric Theatre, Hammersmith W6.

Where shall we meet?: The Piccadilly W1

Bliss. Upstairs at the Piccadilly is one of the best places to eat near Theatreland. They've been there years - the sign on the outside still proclaims the place to be the Little Cottage - and their beams-and-chianti-bottle decor is much beloved by their droves of regulars. Their chicken wings with roasted peppers on the side are the kind of starter that make your friend who ordered something sensible weep with jealousy, but the quantities are such that you can offer them around with total insouciance. Be sure to spill crumbs on the tablecloth, because then a nice man will come along between courses with a hand-held 'hoover' and clean them up.

Flamenco at Sadler's Wells

The Cumbre Flamenca gypsy troupe, Spain's finest flamenco exponents, prepare for tonight's opening at Sadler's Wells, London. They perform until 8 October.
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