Simon Calder: Avoid the airport experience with a 'no-fly' cruise

Suggested Topics

First they came for our nail clippers and tweezers; next, any water bottle containing more than 100ml was confiscated; now, that 500g printer-ink cartridge you hold so dear is prohibited from your hand baggage.

Perhaps I am in a minority in believing that last weekend's outrage, in which terrorists appear to have concealed the lethal explosive PETN in toner cartridges, was not such a triumph for the intelligence services as it was portrayed as being – rather, it was a failure of common sense. And while placing bombs on board aircraft is a thoroughly evil act, I suggest we count this one as a postal, not a passenger, issue.

Yemen is not a natural provider of office supplies to organisations such as synagogues in the Chicago area. Therefore, you might fondly imagine that the staff in the parcels offices in the capital, Sana'a, might have checked the despatches more closely before allowing them anywhere near an aircraft, cargo or passengers. But they didn't. The result: many passengers are newly and understandably alarmed about the danger of unscreened goods travelling in the hold beneath them. The rules appear to vary haphazardly from one country to the next, and even the Government's security tsar, Lord West, conceded that the incident highlighted "a bit of a gap" in aviation security. The best way to paper over it? Ban office supplies, or at least printer cartridges, from cabin baggage (although they may still be carried in hold luggage). Lighters and matches can still be carried through, and glass bottles of highly alcoholic and therefore flammable liquids are on sale as soon as you are through security. But as long as no one sneaks a Hewlett-Packard ink dispenser on, we'll all be safe. Won't we?

Just after the phrase "new tier of terror" entering the travel thesaurus, and PETN joining ATOL and IATA as an important aviation acronyms we can't quite spell out, I booked a cruise for next spring – departing from Southampton, and one of the growing number of "no-fly" cruises on offer from British ports. Neither the latest terrorism scare nor the alarming engine failure on the Qantas Airbus A380 at Singapore triggered the purchase, but avoiding the airport experience was certainly part of the appeal. Were cruising a country, if you see what I mean, it would rank on a par with Cyprus and Egypt at 5 per cent of the package-holiday market. But, curiously, the sharpest growth in cruising is not for ships sailing from British ports – it is for a part of the world where ancient treasures are thinner on the ground: the Gulf.

The Lirica, belonging to MSC Cruises, will be based in Abu Dhabi and Dubai next winter, and the programme goes on sale today. For the next nine days, MSC Cruises assures me that you can book any eight-day cruise starting in the UAE from 28 October 2011 to 9 March 2012 for a flat £399 (based on two people travelling together). To save you checking the calendar, that does include the key holiday departures of 23, 25 and 30 December, and 1 January, plus a handy half-term option of 19 February.

The list of calling points is very different to the usual Mediterranean options: Bahrain, Al Fujairah and the Omani capital, Muscat. You need to get to the Gulf, of course. MSC is offering flights to Abu Dhabi "on request at a discounted price of £500". I don't see this as a bargain; non-stop flights on BA for next October are available at £424 return, and cheaper deals still are likely to be available on airlines such as Royal Brunei from Heathrow to Dubai. But eight days and 8,000 miles for around £800? See you on board.

MSC Cruises: 0844 561 1955

Titanic blunders tell a human story

Travel often gets entangled with tragedy: 92 years after the guns fell silent in the First World War, visiting the Somme in France is a sombre experience; see pages 10-11. And yesterday "Titanic – The Artefact Exhibition" opened at the O2 in London.

The setting is odd – in a corner of the former Millennium Dome – but in one sense appropriate: both were grand designs that went disastrously wrong. But the Dome consumed only £800m of public money and some political careers; 1,517 lives were lost when the "unsinkable" White Star liner struck an iceberg off Newfoundland in 1912.

The fateful voyage fascinates us because of the human stories behind the stark arithmetic of survival (60 per cent of first-class passengers lived; only 25 per cent of third class made it), and also because she sailed in a time of innocence, when threats to transatlantic travellers were natural rather than evil.

Independent Comment
blog comments powered by Disqus
Independent Travel Videos
Independent Travel Videos
Simon Calder in Amsterdam
Independent Travel Videos
Simon Calder in Giverny
Independent Travel Videos
Simon Calder in St John's
Independent Travel Videos
News in pictures
World news in pictures
       
Independent
Travel Shop
Imperial Cities of Morocco
Seven nights half-board from only £799pp Find out more
Historic Sicily
Seven nights half-board from £799pp Find out more
4* all-inclusive Crete
Seven nights from only £399pp Find out more

ES Rentals

    Independent Dating
    and  

    By clicking 'Search' you
    are agreeing to our
    Terms of Use.

    Day In a Page

    Johnny Marr talks relationships and reunions

    He's worked with Modest Mouse, the Pet Shop Boys and Beck, to name a few, and recently released his first solo album. So why, wonders Johnny Marr, do people still hark on about The Smiths?
    After the flood: From Haiti to Britain, one man has captured the devastation of our increasingly deluged lands

    In pictures: After the flood

    From Haiti to Britain, one man has captured the devastation of our increasingly deluged lands
    Death becomes her: Meet the very modern mortician who champions 'cool' funerals

    Death becomes her: A very modern mortician

    Ever considered baking a loved one's remains into a cake or putting their ashes in fireworks? If so, talk to Caitlin Doughty, champion of the alternative death industry.
    How long can the 'Keep Calm' trend carry on?

    How long can the 'Keep Calm' trend carry on?

    At first it seemed clever and cute. Then the 'Keep Calm' motif went mad, spawning endless offshoots.
    The man who built Brum: A lament for the demise of John Madin's Brutalist Birmingham

    John Madin: The man who built Brum

    The architect's buildings were supposed to leave an indelible, futuristic mark on his beloved hometown but they are now being inexorably torn down.
    School of chop: Learning the art of butchery at the Ginger Pig

    School of chop: Learning the art of butchery

    How do you butcher a lamb? Or make Mexican street food in a British kitchen? Christopher Hirst finds out.
    James Pembroke: The man who's eaten everywhere

    The man who's eaten everywhere

    Few people know more about restaurants than James Pembroke, who only spent five mealtimes at home during his entire childhood.
    A Berliner in 1963 – but did John F Kennedy once admire Adolf Hitler?

    A Berliner in 1963 – but did John F Kennedy once admire Adolf Hitler?

    The young JFK praised 'superior' Nordic races during visits to Germany
    Banned Iranian director Mohammad Rasoulof to attend Cannes Film Festival 2013, his first public appearance since prison

    Banned Iranian director to attend Cannes Film Festival

    Mohammad Rasoulof to make his first public appearance since being imprisoned three years ago
    Seeing the larger picture: Inspiring images of space

    Seeing the larger picture: Inspiring images of space

    An exhibition explores images how photography has shaped astronomy
    Eat Spam and carry on: Wartime pamphlets could teach us a thing or two about healthy, thrifty eating

    Eat Spam and carry on

    Wartime pamphlets could teach us a thing or two about healthy, thrifty eating
    Facial hair: Cat beards and the purrrsuit of excellence

    Facial hair

    Cat beards and the purrrsuit of excellence
    The 10 Best salt and pepper sets

    The 10 Best salt and pepper sets

    Whether they're for everyday use or to make your dining table look just right, it's worth getting a stylish shaker...
    Ferran Soriano: Predicting success if Manchester City 'vision' is followed

    Ferran Soriano: Predicting success if Manchester City 'vision' is followed

    Chief executive says trophies will come if a 'core' of suitable players is in place
    Thomas Müller: We couldn't handle losing a Champions League Final again

    Thomas Müller: We couldn't handle losing a Champions League Final again

    The Bayern Munich forward tells Tim Rich his side have to shed chokers' tag after two recent final defeats