Alison Taylor on relationships: 'I love a good friendship-flirt'

 

Share

Made any new friends lately? I only ask because I was at literature festival the other weekend, called Curious Arts – it was jolly, you should go next year – and I came away with two numbers, three email addresses and various invites (*puffs out chest*).

There's this blonde, a bit younger than me, who I've friendship-flirted with once before, but beyond a bit of tweeting we hadn't managed to meet up, until this encounter, somewhere in a field in Hampshire. Now, having bonded over Joan as a Police Woman and pickled onions (not at the same time), I've laughed out loud at two of her DMs and we've got a date in the diary. Exciting!

Then there's 'Silver Fox', the longtime pal of a relatively new friend of mine (brilliantly bonkers, bright red hair, swims in lakes in her knickers), who gave us a lift to Hampshire in his Audi and who has since invited me to a pop-up cinema and an art exhibition.

I got an excitable buzz when I heard from both my new friends after the weekend and realised the trappings aren't all that different from romantic connections, where you may ponder after the fact: that was a definite spark, wasn't it? Did they like me as much I liked them? Will they call? Should I call? Is it too soon?

Now, I'm not boasting here, but when it comes to making new mates, lately I'm Russell Brand in his hot-tub days... I just can't help myself. I jest, of course, but it feels like the time is right for friendships. OK, so you may not get the snogs and sexy times, but you do get the in-jokes, the late-night chats and the intensity necessary to initiate a follow-up on a still-hungover Tuesday. You also get dates.

Sometimes, though, the lines get blurred. Like my Monday evening, back in London. I met up with the guy I'd flirted with on the smoking terrace a few weeks ago (remember him?) and wasn't quite sure if it was a date date or a friend date, given that his text invited me for "a drink and a catch-up". On a Monday. There was also a back-story (isn't there always?) involving another girl he'd just started seeing, which I knew because he was totally upfront when I first met him. But now, Monday night, somewhere in a pub off Oxford Street, had something changed?

It hadn't. "I thought we could be mates," he said. I've heard that one before, I thought.

@lovefoolforever

React Now

Latest stories from i100
Have you tried new the Independent Digital Edition apps?
iJobs Job Widget
iJobs General

Selby Jennings: VP/SVP Credit Quant- NY- Investment Bank

Not specified: Selby Jennings: VP/SVP Credit Quant Top tier investment bank i...

Ashdown Group: Senior Marketing Executive- City of London, Old Street

£40000 - £43000 per annum + benefits: Ashdown Group: Senior Marketing Executiv...

Ashdown Group: Marketing Manager

£40000 - £43000 per annum + benefits: Ashdown Group: An international organisa...

Ashdown Group: Internal Recruiter -Rugby, Warwickshire

£25000 - £30000 per annum: Ashdown Group: Internal Recruiter -Rugby, Warwicksh...

Day In a Page

Read Next
Gwyneth Paltrow and Coldplay's Chris Martin “consciously uncoupled” in March  

My best and worst stories of 2014

Simmy Richman
The Queen spoke of respect for all cultures and faiths in her Christmas message  

Decoding the Queen's speech: Was Her Majesty taking a swipe at Ukip?

Jane Merrick
War with Isis: The West needs more than a White Knight

The West needs more than a White Knight

Despite billions spent on weapons, the US has not been able to counter Isis's gruesome tactics, says Patrick Cockburn
Return to Helmand: Private Davey Graham recalls the day he was shot by the Taliban

'The day I was shot by the Taliban'

Private Davey Graham was shot five times during an ambush in 2007 - it was the first, controversial photograph to show the dangers our soldiers faced in Helmand province
Revealed: the best and worst airlines for delays

Revealed: the best and worst airlines for delays

Many flyers are failing to claim compensation to which they are entitled, a new survey has found
The stories that defined 2014: From the Scottish independence referendum to the Ice Bucket Challenge, our writers voice their opinions

The stories that defined 2014

From the Scottish independence referendum to the Ice Bucket Challenge, our writers voice their opinions
Stoke-on-Trent becomes first British city to be classified as 'disaster resilient' by the United Nations

Disaster looming? Now you know where to head...

Which British city has become the first to be awarded special 'resilience' status by the UN?
Finally, a diet that works: Californian pastor's wildly popular Daniel Plan has seen his congregation greatly reduced

Finally, a diet that works

Californian pastor's wildly popular Daniel Plan has seen his congregation greatly reduced
Say it with... lyrics: The power of song was never greater, according to our internet searches

Say it with... lyrics

The power of song was never greater, according to our internet searches
Professor Danielle George: On a mission to bring back the art of 'thinkering'

The joys of 'thinkering'

Professor Danielle George on why we have to nurture tomorrow's scientists today
Monique Roffey: The author on father figures, the nation's narcissism and New Year reflections

Monique Roffey interview

The author on father figures, the nation's narcissism and New Year reflections
Introducing my anti-heroes of 2014

Introducing my anti-heroes of 2014

Their outrageousness and originality makes the world a bit more interesting, says Ellen E Jones
DJ Taylor: Good taste? It's all a matter of timing...

Good taste? It's all a matter of timing...

It has been hard to form generally accepted cultural standards since the middle of the 19th century – and the disintegration is only going to accelerate, says DJ Taylor
Olivia Jacobs & Ben Caplan: 'Ben thought the play was called 'Christian Love'. It was 'Christie in Love' - about a necrophiliac serial killer'

How we met

Olivia Jacobs and Ben Caplan
Bill Granger recipes: Our chef's breakfasts will revitalise you in time for the New Year

Bill Granger's healthy breakfasts

Our chef's healthy recipes are perfect if you've overindulged during the festive season
Transfer guide: From Arsenal to West Ham - what does your club need in the January transfer window?

Who does your club need in the transfer window?

Most Premier League sides are after a striker, but here's a full run down of the ins and outs that could happen over the next month
The Last Word: From aliens at FA to yak’s milk in the Tour, here’s to 2015

Michael Calvin's Last Word

From aliens at FA to yak’s milk in the Tour, here’s to 2015