Heads up: Top comment and controversy

Man mows Taylor Swift a welcome lawn: 5 other simple ways to get a celeb's attention

Taylor Swift might throw away tons of fan mail unread, but there’s no way she can discard of this particular message, as the enterprising admirer, a Rhode Island farmer, mowed his greeting into a corn maze.

Richard Manfredi heard that Swift was soon to move into the local neighbourhood, and decided against a polite knock on the door to make the 23-year-old starlet feel at home. Instead, he mowed a ginormous greeting message into a field – presumably in case she happened to be passing by helicopter. (Manfredi also showed some entrepreneurial guile by opening up his Swift-themed maze to the public, for an $8 entry fee.)

Swept up by the spirit of neighbourliness and megafandom, here’s a brief guide to getting the attention of your favourite celebrities:

1. The Van Gogh

Right, celebrities get letters all the time. You need to make yours stand out, and there’s no better way of doing this than a little ‘surprise blood’ soaking through the envelope. Your favourite celeb (in this case Jared Leto) will be all like “Oooh, I wonder what body part is contained in this parcel of fun”. Then they will open it. And there – gunging quietly besides the letter – will be your severed ear! Now they know exactly who you are!

Name one celebrity who wouldn't appreciate another ear! Not Jared Leto, for sure  

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

2. The practical option

Sometimes being a celebrity means long trips on the road, with plenty of hangers-on (eurgh) and nobody to look out for your best interests. Even Triple A-listers need some TLC from time to time. And who doesn’t eat cereal? Nobody. So take a lead from this Belieber, who sent Justin a box of good old breakfast crunch, with the note “Here you go, I got you this cereal. Hope you like it”. Plain-speaking can work wonders.

Justin Bieber Justin Bieber. Doesn't get enough cereal  

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

3. The sympathy injury

How far are you willing to go? If the answer is, ‘anything that doesn’t involve long-term physical damage to my body’, then, well, you might as well go home and never try and get a celebrity’s attention again. This Jessie J fan showed how much she admired the singer by breaking her own leg to sympathise with Jessie’s broken foot, and sending her pictures of the proof. Snap! Now you’re friends!

Just grit your teeth, break your leg, and think of Jessie  

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

4. The portrait

Many celebrities spend very little time looking at themselves in the mirror, so they may well appreciate a portrait of themselves, just to remember how good they look to the outside world. It doesn’t matter if you draw like a 6-year-old (more’s the better! Celebs love kids!), it’s the thought that counts, as Benedict Cumberbatch recently admitted: “Look, I'm very flattered, but what do you expect me to do with it?”, he said.

Get out your pencils and draw your way to this man's heart  

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

5. The name change

Ok, so you’re a boring non-celebrity with a boring non-celebrity name that your celebrity will look at and think, ‘God, I’ve never heard that name before. NEXT!” Here’s what to do: change your own name to the celebrity’s OWN, perhaps with a hint towards possible marriage (!) as this Kanye West fan, Linda Resa, did. She changed her name to “Mrs Kanye West” and – for good measure – had a tattoo saying 'Kanye' scrawled across her hind-parts.

That's the real Mrs Kanye. But it could be you  

React Now

Read Next
 

Letters: The West flounders in the Middle East morass

Independent Voices
David Tennant as Hamlet  

To vote no or not to vote no, that is the question... Although do celebrities really have the answer?

David Lister
All this talk of an ‘apocalyptic’ threat is simply childish

Robert Fisk: All this talk of an ‘apocalyptic’ threat is simply childish

Chuck Hagel and Martin Dempsey were pure Hollywood. They only needed Tom Cruise
Mafia Dons: is the Camorra in control of the Granite City?

Mafia Dons: is the Camorra in control of the Granite City?

So claims an EU report which points to the Italian Mob’s alleged grip on everything from public works to property
Emmys look set to overhaul the Oscars as Hollywood’s prize draw

Emmys look set to overhaul the Oscars as Hollywood’s prize draw

Once the poor relation, the awards show now has the top stars and boasts the best drama
French connection: After 1,300 years, there’s a bridge to Mont Saint-Michel

French connection: After 1,300 years, there’s a bridge to Mont Saint-Michel

The ugly causeway is being dismantled, an elegant connection erected in its place. So everyone’s happy, right?
Radio 1 to hire 'YouTube-famous' vloggers to broadcast online

Radio 1’s new top ten

The ‘vloggers’ signed up to find twentysomething audience
David Abraham: Big ideas for the small screen

David Abraham: Big ideas for the small screen

A blistering attack on US influence on British television has lifted the savvy head of Channel 4 out of the shadows
Air strikes? Talk of God? Obama is following the jihadists’ script

Air strikes? Talk of God? Obama is following the jihadists’ script

The President came the nearest he has come yet to rivalling George W Bush’s gormless reaction to 9/11 , says Robert Fisk
Ebola outbreak: Billy Graham’s son declares righteous war on the virus

Billy Graham’s son declares righteous war on Ebola

A Christian charity’s efforts to save missionaries trapped in Africa by the crisis have been justifiably praised. But doubts remain about its evangelical motives
Jeremy Clarkson 'does not see a problem' with his racist language on Top Gear, says BBC

Not even Jeremy Clarkson is bigger than the BBC, says TV boss

Corporation’s head of television confirms ‘Top Gear’ host was warned about racist language
Nick Clegg the movie: Channel 4 to air Coalition drama showing Lib Dem leader's rise

Nick Clegg the movie

Channel 4 to air Coalition drama showing Lib Dem leader's rise
Philip Larkin: Misogynist, racist, miserable? Or caring, playful man who lived for others?

Philip Larkin: What will survive of him?

Larkin's reputation has taken a knocking. But a new book by James Booth argues that the poet was affectionate, witty, entertaining and kind, as hitherto unseen letters, sketches and 'selfies' reveal
Madame Tussauds has shown off its Beyoncé waxwork in Regent's Park - but why is the tourist attraction still pulling in the crowds?

Waxing lyrical

Madame Tussauds has shown off its Beyoncé waxwork in Regent's Park - but why is the tourist attraction still pulling in the crowds?
Texas forensic astronomer finally pinpoints the exact birth of impressionism

Revealed (to the minute)

The precise time when impressionism was born
From slow-roasted to sugar-cured: how to make the most of the British tomato season

Make the most of British tomatoes

The British crop is at its tastiest and most abundant. Sudi Pigott shares her favourite recipes
10 best men's skincare products

Face it: 10 best men's skincare products

Oscar Quine cleanses, tones and moisturises to find skin-savers blokes will be proud to display on the bathroom shelf