QUOTES

It is only in the Alice in Wonderland world of the discrimination industry that anyone could imagine that a body with the recent record of the Commission for Racial Equality should receive further aggrandisement.

Martin Mears, former president of the Law Society

It should be wiped out. The kids on Brookside don't speak the English language. The so-called uneducated now can't spin a sentence.

Author Beryl Bainbridge on the Scouse accent

My show is the stupidest show on TV. If you are watching it, get a life. I would not watch my show. My show is a circus. That's all it is.

Jerry Springer on Jerry Springer

I have no problem with chequebook journalism, as long as some of the cheque goes to me.

Channel 4 newsreader Jon Snow, who interviewed Monica Lewinsky

We were very comfortable with each other. He's a good kisser.

Monica Lewinsky on President Clinton

If I had tried to predict 30 years ago what I would be doing now I would have been certified, taken away and left in a dark room.

News at Ten man Trevor McDonald

When they say it's pasta on a plate, I check under the sauce to make sure it really is.

Manchester United manager Alex Ferguson on the Italians

The closer I came to the centre of power, the less fulfilling and pleasant I found it to be.

Former lobbyist Derek Draper

Men are animals and as such are entitled to humane treatment and should not be trapped or shot or bred for food or fur.

Germaine Greer