QUOTES

I don't think he said that, but if he did I will check it out, and of course I agree with everything the Prime Minister said.

Jack Straw when told that Tony Blair had referred to public sector workers as being "stuck in the mud"

We have taken seats in British prisons and in British interrogation centres.

Gerry Adams on taking seats in Northern Ireland's new executive

Our elevators are millennium-proof, but if you have any doubts, use the stairs.

Notice from lift manufacturer Otis

I'd like to introduce a buffet car on the Circle Line, so people could stay on going round and round getting sloshed.

Ken Livingstone MP

I'm not altogether certain I shall make it myself, but I expect to be well ahead of some people I could name.

Lord Archer on heaven