As a refugee who spent many Christmases alone, I'll be opening up my home to the lonely and isolated this year

Even when I was in a relationship, I had to spend Christmas alone because my partner's parents didn't like the idea of him being with someone of a different race. I'll always remember how that felt, which is why I want to help others now

A young refugee looks across the water (Getty)

It’s no secret that Christmas is one of the most challenging periods for those who may be spending the holidays alone. According to a Daily Mirror report, over four million of us will be alone this holiday, with reasons including being a refugee, widowed, single, or not conforming to the expectations of one’s family. As a refugee myself who came to Britain in 2007 after fleeing my home country of Nigeria because of my sexuality, I experienced first hand what it means to be lonely and suicidal on Christmas Day.

I come from a large family and Christmas for us in Lagos is always a big celebration. Generations of us gather together and celebrate the day with food, music and games. So when I found myself facing the prospect of celebrating Christmas alone in 2007 after the death of my partner a week before Christmas, I had no idea what to do with myself. I was lucky to have friends offering me at seat at their table and being there for me. The food, laughs and gifts at that difficult time is something I will be grateful for all my life. But I spent many Christmases after that alone.

I was once in a relationship with a guy who wouldn’t allow me to come home with him because his parents didn’t want him to date someone of a different race. For the three years we were together, I spent each Christmas Day alone. Most of my friends went home to their families and I missed my own in Nigeria. My coping mechanism was spending time on the phone with various friends while I could hear the laughter in the background. It was not an easy one.

This year, we have seen a huge wave of refugees from the Middle East in Europe. Many of them do not have any family here. Many will be staying in hostels all alone and still suffering from the traumatic experience of the war. Many elderly people will be alone this Christmas. Many LGBT kids will be alone because of rejection from their families.

A few days ago, I posted on my social media accounts an invitation to anyone in London who would appreciate spending the Christmas holiday with my husband and me. A lot of people thought this was a brilliant idea. Many people got in touch and asked if they could join us. To us, this simple act of community gathering is what makes Christmas a beautiful holiday. This is a tradition we hope to continue into the future.

We have been led to believe because of recent global conflicts that suspecting the worst of one another is the best way to stay alive. But I hope we can work to combat that idea. There is always a seat at the table at Christmas – if you do not have an invitation to take one at someone else’s, why not create an invitation for others to be at your table? You never know who may need that invitation the most. Now is the time to help reduce the number of calls made to the Samaritans and to reach out to the most vulnerable in our society by showing someone you care.