Fantasy Band: Charlie Boyer, Charlie Boyer and The Voyeurs
'Klaus Voorman's stark, simple playing on Lennon's Plastic Ono Band is exactly what this elegant group needs'
Drums: Angus Maclise
He was the original drummer for the Velvet Underground and was also part of La Monte Young's “theatre of eternal music”. He quit the group because they booked a gig, which he considered selling out. The perfect drummer.
Organ: Joe Meek
He could also produce the group at his old studio and home at 304 Holloway Road. He would insist on calling the group The Dribcots Space Boat and will be something of a band leader in a crisis.
Bass player: Klaus Voorman
His stark, simple playing on Lennon's Plastic Ono Band is exactly what this elegant group needs.
Rhythm guitar: Ratty from Wind in the Willows
He is tough, economical and river-wise (or rhythm-wise if you will). Ratty will keep things running smoothly when Angus is late again.
Manager: Mr Toad
Ratty's friend Mr Toad has been getting The Dribcots some lovely loud new amplifiers and keenly pursuing any runaway promoters. Poop poop!
Lead guitar: Steve Cropper
The subtle top lines and velvet dinner jacket of Stax Records' Steve Cropper are the anchors to our space boat and his chopped one note solos are the rudder.
Vocals: Ray Davies
With his beautifully curt English voice, he will sing The Dribcots' songs just so. He will leave time between rhymes to let the girls scream and for the boys to perfect their “ratty hip-shake”.
Charlie Boyer & The Voyeurs' debut album, 'Clarietta', is out now
Art Megumi Igarashi criticises Japan's 'backwards' attitude to women's sexual expression
tv Singer could become the most unlikely star of Westeros
Ray Davies' Sunny Afternoon scoops the most awardsTheatre
Grace DentChannel 4 show proves there's no app for happiness
Arts & Ents blogs
- 1 Gwyneth Paltrow and Chris Martin file for divorce after 10 years of marriage
- 2 Rarest Beanie Baby bought for just £10 at car boot sale could be sold for £62,500 on eBay
- 3 Katie Hopkins and The Sun editor David Dinsmore reported to police for incitement to racial hatred following migrant boat column
- 4 Bookies now say Ed Miliband is more likely to be prime minister than David Cameron
- 5 Australian student Tommy Connolly, 23, adopts his pregnant, homeless 17-year-old cousin to give her a chance at 'a better life'
Safe House, TV review: Plenty of teasers to keep us guessing but spare us the cliches
Britain's Got Talent 2015: RSPCA investigating Marc Metral's miming dog after cruelty complaints
Star Wars: Rogue One trailer: Watch the teaser for the Jedi-less Death Star heist film
Avengers Age of Ultron 'after credits' scene leaks online days before cinema release
Louis Tomlinson is launching his own record label and has already 'signed two acts'
If I’m being racially abused I don’t need a stranger with a saviour complex to rescue me
The only black face in the Ukip manifesto is on the page about overseas aid
Ukip is the only main political party to not address LGBT rights in its manifesto
Food banks: One million Britons will soon be using them, according to Trussell Trust
Religion isn't growing, it is becoming vigorous in its demise, says philosopher AC Grayling
Katie Hopkins on LBC: Listen to caller taking The Sun columnist to task over migrant comments