Pandora: Bill makes a date with green-fingered Charles

Ever since his wife's ascent to the office of Secretary of State, the former US president Bill Clinton has clocked up more air miles than U2 on tour. (Getty Images)

Ever since his wife's ascent to the office of Secretary of State, the former US president Bill Clinton has clocked up more air miles than U2 on tour.

There have been repeated trips to South America, not to mention the tête-à-tête with North Korea's belligerent leader Kim Jong-il.

Now, news of another encounter with an unelected figurehead with inflated ideas of their global import. Well, sort of.

We are told that Clinton paid a private visit to Clarence House at the end of last week after initiating a meeting with the Prince of Wales.

"He requested the visit," explains our source. "He wanted to discuss climate change and global poverty."

Of course, the green-fingered Prince's views on conservation have not always been such hot property: he has long been ridiculed for his hobby of conversing with his vegetables.

Were any such recommendations passed on to Mr Clinton? "I'm afraid we cannot say any more," says a spokesman for His Royal Highness. "It was a private meeting, after all."

Shaffer finds frat pack in vogue

*At last! Bee Shaffer has landed a job. The last time Pandora heard from Shaffer, daughter of the US Vogue editor Anna Wintour, she was bemoaning the shortage of journalism jobs. Eleven months later, she has been hired as an assistant to Ricky Van Veen, creator of frat-boyish comedy website collegehumour.com. It's quite a departure for Shaffer. The closest thing to a fashion feature we can find on the CH site is a guide to dressing as a "drunk uncle" on Halloween. "Wear a filthy dress shirt," readers are advised. Chic!

Claret Campbell feels the pinch

*Alastair Campbell, fanatical Burnley FC fan (and sometime Labour spin-doctor), was the victim of a nasty approach from a group of lairy fans following the Clarets' match against Hull (billed as the Premier League's first ever Ladies Day) at the weekend. "As I mixed and mingled afterwards, and posed for a few pictures, I experienced a rare double buttock bum-pinch from two very friendly ladies," he complains in his weekly column for the Football Fanhouse website. The horror! Time to get Sky Sports?

Kai's the limit for the new Rooney

Pandora offers hearty congratulations to Wayne and Coleen Rooney, following the birth of their first child yesterday afternoon. The couple have, according to reports, decided to name their newborn son Kai Wayne Rooney – presumably after the Japanese word kai, meaning "the ocean".

Or could that be after the Latin term for "rejoice"? Or, hang on, perhaps it's the Burmese word meaning "strong" or "unbreakable". Or the Chinese for "victory". Oh no, this has got to be it: the Maori for "to eat". Touching! (Sniff).

Doctor No? Davies rejects US move

"Absolutely not, no," retorts the Doctor Who revivalist Russell T Davies when Pandora inquires as to the possibility of the Time Lord going to America. "As you know, I lie my way through these things but no, absolutely not."

Right, then. We'll take that as a no. Unless, of course, Davies is lying? "I bet you a hundred quid I'm not! I'm developing things – but new things. And I'm not going to tell you what they are because they will probably never exist."

Excellent. So we'll take that as a no comment, shall we?