Who will be the face (or cheeks) of 2013?
It's the time of year we start looking for new ways to tell the time of year, with the help of naked do-gooders, furry animals, and the uncommonly chiselled pecs of a 71-year-old who should know better.
Calendars are big business, defying the march of time into the digital age to keep a place under our Christmas trees and (if they're not too awful) on our walls and fridges.
Amazon already offers more than 3,000 calendars for 2013, a figure boosted by three competing trends: celebrities; cute animals usually doing human things (yoga, say); and people with their bits out for charity.
On Saturday, the Calendar Club opened the first of its 300 temporary UK stores in Glasgow. It says it will sell four million calendars this year and expects One Direction to top the charts.
"Sales are good considering the challenge of digital calendars," says Natalie Taylor at the Club. "People get hooked on a theme and paper calendars are also still practical and cheap."
The original Calendar Girls can take the credit for much of the nudity; the Rylstone Women's Institute inspired countless imitators – including the Bare Naked Cavers and the Game Birds – and a movie when they stripped for leukaemia research in 1999.
But we skip back several more months for the origins of themed time-keeping. In 1977, the London printer Laurence Prince created a calendar tribute to the late Elvis Presley. His company, Danilo, now supplies 10,000 retailers worldwide. Its biggest seller is Cliff Richard, whose taut torso has shifted 1.5 million calendars (second only to One Direction last year).
The singer, who turns 72 this month, has said he works out daily for months before his shoot – and insists photos are not airbrushed.
- 2 Harry Potter fans can apply to the Hogwarts-inspired College of Wizardry
- 3 Jessica Chambers: 19-year-old woman 'doused with lighter fluid and burned alive' in the US
- 4 Russell Brand calls Nigel Farage 'poundshop Enoch Powell' in BBC Question Time debate
- 5 Orange Wednesdays are no more
Weather bomb in pictures: Storms cuts power for tens of thousands – and snow is on the way
Jessica Chambers: 19-year-old woman 'doused with lighter fluid and burned alive' in the US
Russell Brand calls Nigel Farage 'poundshop Enoch Powell' in BBC Question Time debate
Russell Brand was rendered speechless on Question Time by this man
Fury at Airbus after it hints the super-jumbo may be mothballed
Disgruntled RBS worker writes hilarious open letter to Russell Brand after anti-capitalist publicity stunt leaves him hungry
Nigel Farage defends Kerry Smith 'ch***y' comment: 'If you are going for a Chinese, what do you say you’re going for?'
Nigel Farage's approval rating hits 'record low' as popularity suffers in wake of Ukip sex scandal
Pakistan school attack live: Taliban kill at least 132 children in 'horrifying' massacre
Sony hack: Angelina Jolie branded 'seriously out of her mind' in further embarrassing leaked email saga
Panic Saturday: 13 million Britons spend £1.2bn – while 13 million others across the country live in poverty unable to afford food
£30000 - £35000 per annum: Recruitment Genius: An exciting opportunity to join...
£30000 - £35000 per annum: Recruitment Genius: We have an excellent role for a...
Negotiable: Recruitment Genius: An IT Support Analyst is required to join the ...
Excellent Salary: Austen Lloyd: SURREY - An outstanding high level opportunity...