36 cucumbers have been found around the Hampstead Garden Suburb area

Vegetable crime wave: It’s the phantom cucumber dropper of old London Town

The Government may be celebrating a recent drop in crime numbers but it clearly hadn’t accounted for the vegetable crime wave that’s sweeping the nation.

Jimmy Hill (dark blazer) puts the players’ case to the press when a strike against the maximum wage loomed in January 1961

The Last Word: Wayne Rooney makes a mockery of the rights footballers once fought for

England striker lacks the conviction to speak his mind, letting third parties do it

Fragrant watermelon soup could be served as a starter or dessert

Fragrant watermelon soup

Serves 4-6

Wine: Something for the weekend?

Night in

Scones with jam and cream are a British institution

The cream of all teas: Get your scones, jam and cream just right - with the help of mathematics

Scones with jam and cream are a British institution and people from Cornwall and Devon each claim the cream tea its own. But the Cornish believe they have the might of mathematical reasoning behind them.

Wine: Something for the weekend

2012 La Vieille Ferme, Côtes du Ventoux

Tim Key: ‘I captained my school football team in 1992 so I’m no stranger to the big stage’

This week I scored such a beautiful goal at football, I really need to lay it down in print. It was as sweet as a plum; a dipping volley right off my laces that left the goalkeeper helpless – confused and gaping, like a teenaged giraffe coming face to face with a mirror for the first time. It was sublime. People need to be told about it.

Slice it up: Moschino Cheap and Chic s/s 2013

iStyle: If you like piña coladas

Spiky yet sweet - the fashion pack is feeling fruity as pineapple emblems make this summer totally tropical, says Stephanie Hirschmiller

Pour it on: It's even possible for a watering can to embrace chintz. Wild & Wolf watering can, £34.95, wildandwolf.com

iStyle: Chintz charming

Laura Ashley is celebrating its 60th birthday by looking back to the 1970s. It couldn’t have come at a better time. Patterns, florals and faux Victoriana are big again, says Trish Lorenz

Wines of the week

Terry Kirby selects the best bottles to buy
Carmen Sheridan mixes summer punches at The Lido Cafe, Brockwell Lido, London

Packing a punch: The fruity drink is fun to make and perfect for sipping outside this summer

The blend of fruits, herbs, botanicals and booze is almost like cooking. Just with drinks instead of food, says Angela Clutton.

Cheeta with Maureen O'Sullivan and Johnny Weissmuller in Tarzan The Ape Man in 1932

What really separates us from the apes?

Is it our immortal souls? Or our sense of irony? Or perhaps our (comparatively) hair-free torsos?

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Day In a Page

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Independent Travel
Pompeii, Capri & the Bay of Naples
Seven Cities of Italy
Burgundy, the River Rhone & Provence
Prague, Budapest and Vienna
Lake Garda
Minoan Crete and Santorini
Prices correct as of 1 May 2015
Fishing for votes with Nigel Farage: The Ukip leader shows how he can work an audience as he casts his line to the disaffected of Grimsby

Fishing is on Nigel Farage's mind

Ukip leader casts a line to the disaffected
Who is bombing whom in the Middle East? It's amazing they don't all hit each other

Who is bombing whom in the Middle East?

Robert Fisk untangles the countries and factions
China's influence on fashion: At the top of the game both creatively and commercially

China's influence on fashion

At the top of the game both creatively and commercially
Lord O’Donnell: Former cabinet secretary on the election and life away from the levers of power

The man known as GOD has a reputation for getting the job done

Lord O'Donnell's three principles of rule
Rainbow shades: It's all bright on the night

Rainbow shades

It's all bright on the night
'It was first time I had ever tasted chocolate. I kept a piece, and when Amsterdam was liberated, I gave it to the first Allied soldier I saw'

Bread from heaven

Dutch survivors thank RAF for World War II drop that saved millions
Britain will be 'run for the wealthy and powerful' if Tories retain power - Labour

How 'the Axe' helped Labour

UK will be 'run for the wealthy and powerful' if Tories retain power
Rare and exclusive video shows the horrific price paid by activists for challenging the rule of jihadist extremists in Syria

The price to be paid for challenging the rule of extremists

A revolution now 'consuming its own children'
Welcome to the world of Megagames

Welcome to the world of Megagames

300 players take part in Watch the Skies! board game in London
'Nymphomaniac' actress reveals what it was really like to star in one of the most explicit films ever

Charlotte Gainsbourg on 'Nymphomaniac'

Starring in one of the most explicit films ever
Robert Fisk in Abu Dhabi: The Emirates' out-of-sight migrant workers helping to build the dream projects of its rulers

Robert Fisk in Abu Dhabi

The Emirates' out-of-sight migrant workers helping to build the dream projects of its rulers
Vince Cable interview: Charging fees for employment tribunals was 'a very bad move'

Vince Cable exclusive interview

Charging fees for employment tribunals was 'a very bad move'
Iwan Rheon interview: Game of Thrones star returns to his Welsh roots to record debut album

Iwan Rheon is returning to his Welsh roots

Rheon is best known for his role as the Bastard of Bolton. It's gruelling playing a sadistic torturer, he tells Craig McLean, but it hasn't stopped him recording an album of Welsh psychedelia
Russell Brand's interview with Ed Miliband has got everyone talking about The Trews

Everyone is talking about The Trews

Russell Brand's 'true news' videos attract millions of viewers. But today's 'Milibrand' interview introduced his resolutely amateurish style to a whole new crowd
Morne Hardenberg interview: Cameraman for BBC's upcoming show Shark on filming the ocean's most dangerous predator

It's time for my close-up

Meet the man who films great whites for a living