Words: johnson, n.

IN A beguiling review of William Boyd's first novel, A.N. Wilson noted the clinical references to the "penis". Boyd listened: in An Ice- Cream War it is "cock". Redolent of plumbing, this highlights a need for some more dignifed slang - johnson, perhaps.

The bad, sad and crazy movies that mock mental illness

MOVIE-MAKERS have been giving mental illness a bad name, according to a leading psychiatrist who has dissected scores of films where the mentally sick are too often portrayed as mad, bad and dangerous.

Kidman play becomes the hottest ticket in town

RICHARD GERE had a good seat for Nicole Kidman's Friday night performance of The Blue Room, but many hundreds of would-be theatregoers were not so lucky.

The Critics: Who said that xenophobia never pays?

Pepe le Moko U Men with Guns 15 Lethal Weapon 4 15 The Doom Generation 18 Kissing a Fool 15

Cinema: The Eighties revival starts here: and praise be, it's going to be funny

THE BEST THING about retro is that it comes with built-in wisdom - you know, for instance, that this time round pedal pushers are OK, but leg warmers are not. We can laugh in a world-weary, Nineties way at the effusive octogenarian photographer in The Wedding Singer (12) who tells a couple, "you'll be one of those who stays together for ever and ever, like Donald and Ivana, Woody and Mia." While we in the real world live through this decade of retro trying to avoid the nightmare bits of the recent past, cinema revels in all their hideous glory.

Hollywood star gives hope to Tibetans

Peter Popham sees Richard Gere lend a sympathetic ear at Delhi's Speaker's Corner

Film: Fan facts - Cindy Crawford and Mel Gibson, health role models

A survey by 'Top Sante' health magazine revealed that women choose Cindy Crawford and Mel Gibson as role models. But why?.

Film: `Los Angeles is full of big men who've lost their balls'

Mike Figgis's career as a director has had great highs and lows, but two things remain constant: his love-hate relationship with Hollywood, and the disorienting sexuality of his work. Mike Hasted talks to him about his latest, `One Night Stand'.

We can do lochs too

Wales scarcely figured on Hollywood's map, but 'First Knight' gave the Welsh ideas. Could Wales be the new Scotland? They invited some US film executives to take a look

Comment: The Dalai Luvvie - Profile: Richard Gere

Simon Worrall on the Hollywood actor who is the leading celebrity campaigner for a free Tibet

IS SHE ALL MOUTH?

`Pretty Woman' won her stardom - if not critical acclaim. But with `My Best Friend's Wedding' and `Conspiracy Theory', Julia Roberts is showing signs that she can act as well as flirt

Grey matter: how Liz grew up

There comes a moment when a woman must stop dyeing and start to live an honest life. Elizabeth Taylor's time has come.

'Barry may be the walrus of love. But Luther is the real thing'

Probing, insidious and effortless ... Luther Vandross's voice caresses parts other vocalists cannot reach. His fluctuating weight, the visible emblem of his vulnerability, just makes you love him more - even though he's just stood us all up. By Phil Johnson

KISS THE GIRLS AND MAKE THEM SIGH

Kissing and the movies go together like Bogey and Bacall. Or at least they used to, before sex got into the pictures. So for Valentine's Day, why not celebrate the lost art of screen romance?
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Middle East crisis: We know all too much about the cruelty of Isis – but all too little about who they are

We know all too much about the cruelty of Isis – but all too little about who they are

Now Obama has seen the next US reporter to be threatened with beheading, will he blink, asks Robert Fisk
Neanderthals lived alongside humans for centuries, latest study shows

Final resting place of our Neanderthal neighbours revealed

Bones dated to 40,000 years ago show species may have died out in Belgium species co-existed
Scottish independence: The new Scots who hold fate of the UK in their hands

The new Scots who hold fate of the UK in their hands

Scotland’s immigrants are as passionate about the future of their adopted nation as anyone else
Britain's ugliest buildings: Which monstrosities should be nominated for the Dead Prize?

Blight club: Britain's ugliest buildings

Following the architect Cameron Sinclair's introduction of the Dead Prize, an award for ugly buildings, John Rentoul reflects on some of the biggest blots on the UK landscape
eBay's enduring appeal: Online auction site is still the UK's most popular e-commerce retailer

eBay's enduring appeal

The online auction site is still the UK's most popular e-commerce site
Culture Minister Ed Vaizey: ‘lack of ethnic minority and black faces on TV is weird’

'Lack of ethnic minority and black faces on TV is weird'

Culture Minister Ed Vaizey calls for immediate action to address the problem
Artist Olafur Eliasson's latest large-scale works are inspired by the paintings of JMW Turner

Magic circles: Artist Olafur Eliasson

Eliasson's works will go alongside a new exhibition of JMW Turner at Tate Britain. He tells Jay Merrick why the paintings of his hero are ripe for reinvention
Josephine Dickinson: 'A cochlear implant helped me to discover a new world of sound'

Josephine Dickinson: 'How I discovered a new world of sound'

After going deaf as a child, musician and poet Josephine Dickinson made do with a hearing aid for five decades. Then she had a cochlear implant - and everything changed
Greggs Google fail: Was the bakery's response to its logo mishap a stroke of marketing genius?

Greggs gives lesson in crisis management

After a mishap with their logo, high street staple Greggs went viral this week. But, as Simon Usborne discovers, their social media response was anything but half baked
Matthew McConaughey has been singing the praises of bumbags (shame he doesn't know how to wear one)

Matthew McConaughey sings the praises of bumbags

Shame he doesn't know how to wear one. Harriet Walker explains the dos and don'ts of fanny packs
7 best quadcopters and drones

Flying fun: 7 best quadcopters and drones

From state of the art devices with stabilised cameras to mini gadgets that can soar around the home, we take some flying objects for a spin
Joey Barton: ‘I’ve been guilty of getting a bit irate’

Joey Barton: ‘I’ve been guilty of getting a bit irate’

The midfielder returned to the Premier League after two years last weekend. The controversial character had much to discuss after his first game back
Andy Murray: I quit while I’m ahead too often

Andy Murray: I quit while I’m ahead too often

British No 1 knows his consistency as well as his fitness needs working on as he prepares for the US Open after a ‘very, very up and down’ year
Ferguson: In the heartlands of America, a descent into madness

A descent into madness in America's heartlands

David Usborne arrived in Ferguson, Missouri to be greeted by a scene more redolent of Gaza and Afghanistan
BBC’s filming of raid at Sir Cliff’s home ‘may be result of corruption’

BBC faces corruption allegation over its Sir Cliff police raid coverage

Reporter’s relationship with police under scrutiny as DG is summoned by MPs to explain extensive live broadcast of swoop on singer’s home