A restaurant where you burn the calories while you're eating? No thanks...

Instead of fear-mongering with terrifying statistics, or setting up restaurants that promise an evening of calorie free dining, shouldn't we promote the art of moderation?

Share
Related Topics

Yesterday morning I was rudely awakened by BBC Radio 4’s
Today Programme, informing me a breakfast of bacon and sausage would likely
lead to an early grave.

A cheery wake-up call if ever there was one, especially since I’d woken feeling particularly ravenous.

Imagine my curiosity then, when my first call of the morning was from a company launching the UK’s first ever ‘calorie-neutral’ restaurant, where patrons exercise between courses.

German domestic appliance company Miele will set up pop-up restaurant, Steam, in Covent Garden next Wednesday. If the restaurant proves popular, the company hopes to roll them out across the country.

Quite apart from wondering what on earth to wear to the sporty eatery, (Trainers? Tracksuit? A smart dress?) it’s obvious to me that Miele has created a monster.

Diners, or ‘steamees’, will be invited to chow down on food cooked by award-winning head chef, Frederick Forster, before participating in a number of activities to ensure they offset their calorie footprint. Activities include stretching to aid digestion and sitting on vibrating seat-pads to increase calorie burn.

The food is steamed to preserve the natural flavours, vitamins and textures and chef Frederick Forster says his aim is to show that healthy food can be tasty too.

Of course Steam will be a unique experience, rather like a pole dancing class or climbing Kilimanjaro. But, if I’m honest, it’s about as appealing as downing a large bowl of pasta before doing two laps of the school hockey pitch. Not very.

As well as possibly inflicting shocking indigestion on its diners (whatever happened to leaving two hours between eating and exercising?) Miele has seemingly invented an entirely pointless dining experience and is selling it to us like it’s the next big thing.

The concept neatly side-steps the whole purpose of eating, which is to take calories and energy from our food. In the same way as eating a stick of celery is counter-productive, so too is this meal deal.

Sure, you might have a jolly old time vibrating and stretching with friends. And I don’t doubt the food will be delicious (beef fillet with beansprout salad, quail egg cocotte with mushroom and leek fondue, and prawn stuffed lemon sole with herb butter sauce.) However, a restaurant which gives with one hand while it takes with another is baffling to me.

We wouldn’t would jump at the chance to watch a film if we had to have our memories wiped once we'd left the auditorium, so why must we rave about a restaurant that robs us of precious calories? If I’m paying for the buggers, they’re coming home with me.

The news that processed meat is bad for our hearts can’t have come as a surprise to many. We all know what’s healthy and what’s not, but we’re too greedy to say no and either too lazy or too busy to put in enough hours at the gym to justify our calorie intake.

Instead of fear-mongering with terrifying statistics, or setting up restaurants that promise an evening of calorie free dining, we should be promoting the art of moderation, a skill we can apply to all aspects of our lives.

Granted, Steam encourages healthy eating and, in that, it has my whole-hearted (if slightly hungry) support. But asking us to exercise while we eat? Well that’s one step too far for me, I’m afraid.

*Files copy and reaches for a bag of crisps.*

React Now

Latest stories from i100
Have you tried new the Independent Digital Edition apps?
iJobs Job Widget
iJobs General

Teacher

£130 - £131 per day: Randstad Education Chelmsford: Ks1 teacher required for m...

Project Manager (infrastructure, upgrades, rollouts)

£38000 - £45000 Per Annum + excellent benefits package: Clearwater People Solu...

MI Analyst and SQL Developer (SQL, SSAS, SSRS)

£28000 - £32500 Per Annum + 28 days holiday, pension, discounts and more: Clea...

Creative Content Executive (writer, social media, website)

£30000 - £35000 Per Annum + 25 days holiday and bonus: Clearwater People Solut...

Day In a Page

Read Next
Pupils educated at schools like Eton (pictured) are far more likely to succeed in politics and the judiciary, the report found  

When elitism grips the top of British society to this extent, there is only one answer: abolish private schools

Chris Blackhurst
 

August catch-up: second languages, the secret of love and is it all right to call someone stupid?

John Rentoul
Israel-Gaza conflict: No victory for Israel despite weeks of death and devastation

Robert Fisk: No victory for Israel despite weeks of devastation

Palestinians have won: they are still in Gaza, and Hamas is still there
Mary Beard writes character reference for Twitter troll who called her a 'slut'

Unlikely friends: Mary Beard and the troll who called her a ‘filthy old slut’

The Cambridge University classicist even wrote the student a character reference
America’s new apartheid: Prosperous white districts are choosing to break away from black cities and go it alone

America’s new apartheid

Prosperous white districts are choosing to break away from black cities and go it alone
Amazon is buying Twitch for £600m - but why do people want to watch others playing Xbox?

What is the appeal of Twitch?

Amazon is buying the video-game-themed online streaming site for £600m - but why do people want to watch others playing Xbox?
Tip-tapping typewriters, ripe pongs and slides in the office: Bosses are inventing surprising ways of making us work harder

How bosses are making us work harder

As it is revealed that one newspaper office pumps out the sound of typewriters to increase productivity, Gillian Orr explores the other devices designed to motivate staff
Manufacturers are struggling to keep up with the resurgence in vinyl records

Hard pressed: Resurgence in vinyl records

As the resurgence in vinyl records continues, manufacturers and their outdated machinery are struggling to keep up with the demand
Tony Jordan: 'I turned down the chance to research Charles Dickens for a TV series nine times ... then I found a kindred spirit'

A tale of two writers

Offered the chance to research Charles Dickens for a TV series, Tony Jordan turned it down. Nine times. The man behind EastEnders and Life on Mars didn’t feel right for the job. Finally, he gave in - and found an unexpected kindred spirit
Could a later start to the school day be the most useful educational reform of all?

Should pupils get a lie in?

Doctors want a later start to the school day so that pupils can sleep later. Not because teenagers are lazy, explains Simon Usborne - it's all down to their circadian rhythms
Prepare for Jewish jokes – as Jewish comedians get their own festival

Prepare for Jewish jokes...

... as Jewish comedians get their own festival
SJ Watson: 'I still can't quite believe that Before I Go to Sleep started in my head'

A dream come true for SJ Watson

Watson was working part time in the NHS when his debut novel, Before I Go to Sleep, became a bestseller. Now it's a Hollywood movie, too. Here he recalls the whirlwind journey from children’s ward to A-list film set
10 best cycling bags for commuters

10 best cycling bags for commuters

Gear up for next week’s National Cycle to Work day with one of these practical backpacks and messenger bags
Paul Scholes: Three at the back isn’t working yet but given time I’m hopeful Louis van Gaal can rebuild Manchester United

Paul Scholes column

Three at the back isn’t working yet but given time I’m hopeful Louis van Gaal can rebuild Manchester United
Kate Bush, Hammersmith Apollo music review: A preamble, then a coup de théâtre - and suddenly the long wait felt worth it

Kate Bush shows a voice untroubled by time

A preamble, then a coup de théâtre - and suddenly the long wait felt worth it
Robot sheepdog technology could be used to save people from burning buildings

The science of herding is cracked

Mathematical model would allow robots to be programmed to control crowds and save people from burning buildings
Tyrant: Is the world ready for a Middle Eastern 'Dallas'?

This tyrant doesn’t rule

It’s billed as a Middle Eastern ‘Dallas’, so why does Fox’s new drama have a white British star?