News Vinnie Jones ha revealed he has skin cancer

Snatch star says condition has 'knocked me for six and made me reassess my life and goals'

Jones accused of 'air rage'

My Greatest Mistake: Colin Kennedy, editor, 'Empire' Magazine

'I had the hottest film story in the UK, and it got killed'

Portrait: Mr big shot

He's got the Roller, the jewellery and he admits that being a villain draws the women. But Dave Courtney - who inspired Vinnie Jones' character in `Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels' - also bears the scars of his life of crime

Television: Peter York On Ads No 288: Blackthorn Cider

Cider really is the pits. The commercials of course, not the drink, I can't remember what it tastes like. But the commercials, historically designed to give the biggest grown-up balls possible to a drink associated with sub-teen trialists, have been famously idiotic and deeply Kerrang. The snake in the desert. All those arrows. (Though I have to say the Johnny Vaughan "I've just been to the lavatory" for Strongbow was rather good.)

We'll just have to put it down to a sense-of-irony failure

I JUST don't get it. I know that part of the deal of appearing in print every day is that one licks a finger, holds it aloft to the breeze of change; that one skims the froth of daily news and attempts to establish a light, coherent pattern. Heaven knows, I do my best.

Captain Moonlight: Can I interest you in a small sharp object?

TARRAH! That, in case you are in any doubt, is the sound of a drum roll. Now close your eyes and imagine several fairy lights flashing on and off while a four-piece combo in electric-blue dinner jackets breaks into an enthusiastic if indifferent rendition of "Chariots of Fire". What can it all mean? I will tell you: it means a Major Moonlight Announcement! Steady. Deep breaths. Now look at that picture, the one, typically, right over there. Note the moon and the top hat. You are looking at the new Moonlight Badge, a very limited edition, a piece of poetry in enamel and metal, fancy shape, 17mm by 10mm, polished silver plated finish, complete with tietack and clutch attachment, artificed to the standards you would expect from the noble firm of Thomas Fattorini (est 1827), silversmiths, enamellers and medallists, in return for a quite substantial payment less a bit off for the plug and a mention of their e-mail address, sales@fattorini.co.uk.

Vinnie Jones tackles sensitivity

Soon there will be no facet of human activity that this man hasn't dragged into disrepute

Video Watch

Lock, Stock And Two Smoking Barrels (18), available to rent

You can pick your relations

As more women choose to remain childless, a new breed of maiden aunt is emerging - the sibling who is keen to play an increasingly active role in parenting from the outside.

Jazz: The Vinnie Jones school of jazz

JOE ZAWINUL SYNDICATE

First Night: The proof that lads' culture can be classy

'Real Classy Affair' Royal Court London

Cold Call: Jack O'Sullivan Rings Vinnie Jones

PHONING RATHER than meeting Vinnie Jones seems smart. After all, he once bit a reporter's nose when the conversation got too hot. And he could be the next Clint Eastwood, after his lifelike performance as a gangland debt-collector in the new film Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels. So Vinnie's agent agrees a time when football's hard man will ring.

Education: Peer pressure retards boys

SCHOOLBOYS WORSHIP the image of unemotional "hard men" such as Vinnie Jones - who are good at football and skimp at schoolwork - but it may hold them back academically, research suggests. The solution may be to split boys' classes into smaller groups so they can express themselves and not be worried by peer pressure, says Dr Anne Phoenix of Birkbeck College, London.

Lock, stock and two smoking barrels

Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels (right), the heavily-hyped debut from tyro writer-director Guy Ritchie, is the perfect post-pub crowd- pleaser. Set in a cockney-inflected underworld where Tarantino meets Ealing, it follows the exploits of four friends as they attempt to pay-off a six- figure gambling debt by robbing their villainous neighbours. The result: a high body count, and a sometimes confusing tangle of criss-crossing sub-plots. There's nothing subtle about Ritchie's screenplay, and only football's hard-man, Vinnie Jones, who is menacing as a paternalistic debt collector, brings a hint of shading to his characterisation. But LS&2SB is made with such style, rude energy, and humour that its rough edges not only don't matter, but ultimately add to its populist - and very British - charm. On general release
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