Yes, the job is an enormous pain in the arse. But if all of these things are unthinkable for the British sensibility, why are we comfortable for it all to be happening each and every day to Bulgarians? 

October also sees the start of Black History Month, an opportunity for Caucasian 20-something eternal students with names like Crispin Bunter-Wilmthorpe to handcuff themselves to the gates of Chessington World of Adventures after taking exception to the shocking level of cultural appropriation in the Penguins of Madagascar Treetop Hoppers ride

Believing in the innate empathetic, harmonious nature of all women is like believing all gay men will, when push comes to shove, be able to help you with interior design. At best you’re an idiot and at worse a completely offensive one

Remember when millions of people with no meaningful view on the EU referendum heard a multi-millionaire West Hampstead mega-star called Emma Thompson call Britain “a misery-laden cake-fuelled grey old island”? This is Whedon's Emma Thompson moment

Last time I looked Nicola Sturgeon was flying all over the globe negotiating with world leaders, earning a mint, looking her slimmest self and living -  what the kids call -  her best life ever

The Labour leader is suggesting a ban on sexist after-work drinking. But how on earth do we police that? Should all after-work groups, by law, contain at least two women or at least one gender fluid person identifying as female? 

'The Matter of The North’ comes at a time when London has adored itself to a point of near self-destruction

I thought of a joke here about Jady Duarte’s Bolt-In-My-Bed pictures spreading quicker than her ankles, but this would lead to me spending at least 72 hours fielding abuse from whining 19-year-old offendatrons claiming 'slut-shaming'

Imagine, if you can, even sitting in a meeting when this gargantuan wodge was mooted as the one you so richly deserve, just for being brilliant old you

If men and women are equal, why when Orlando Bloom’s genitalia is exposed on the internet is there a distinct dearth of concern for his feelings?

Women, not men, propel the cult of motherhood and spread the frightening notion that life will never be truly complete without a baby, and that no career plaudit can compare

Heavy D from Storagers Hunt UK claimed, without a flicker of irony in his pre-show interview, that his personal hero was Another Level’s Dane Bowers. This is the kind of logic one can’t argue with

Andrea Leadsom pointed out that bearing children gave her 'a very real stake in the future'. This, as opposed to women like Jennifer Aniston and myself, who would smash their barren fists upon a nuclear detonator at a second’s notice screaming, ‘The world ends after meeeeee!’ 

A London restaurateur reported rejecting an online dinner reservation due to the added request: "Do not send a European to my table, I want a British waiter." He's mistaken if he thinks our restaurant industry isn't propped up by Europeans

There is no clearer sign of the forthcoming apocalypse than the suspension of Holly and Phil running through new trends in vagina steaming and the latest in high street Capri pants

How do we protect young children from the exact mistakes many of us made ourselves? The tendency must be to become so worried about our hypocrisy being exposed that we don’t say anything at all