Moving house really brings you up to speed with the state of customer service in modern-day Britain. For the past two weeks I have been waging an almost constant war, via Twitter, email and phone, to get companies to do the simplest things like turn up on time (or even on the right day), deliver the correct item or offer help over the phone in something resembling human. I am fortunate in that I am a very minor celebrity with a healthy amount of Twitter followers. Time and again, the moment I tweeted my grievances the managing director or head of customer care would be in touch within 15 minutes promising to solve the problem. This is brilliant for me, but it's a sad state of affairs that problems that are easily solved can only be dealt with because I once dressed as a large squirrel.

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Oh what a beautiful morning...

It's got to stop. Richard and Judy are tunnelling their way out and someone's got to stop them. A show like Get A Life! would be all very well for presenters like Esther Rantzen or Anne Robinson, whose dubious talents would remain safely unstretched by a comfy topic-related format combined with the opportunity to badger their audience. But Richard and Judy are like farmers - outstanding in their field - and the powers that be at This Morning (10.30am ITV) would be ill-advised to let them drift off into the vacuum of prime-time nonentity without putting up a fight.

And Norm is ever so grateful

So now it's OK to like Radio 2. But who are they, these Wogan fanciers, these Stewpot junkies? Do you know any? What kind of person tunes into Jimmy Young? Someone like Frances Line, as it happens. By Sue Gaisford

Press swamp public at West committal 1/36point

Amid massive media attention but only moderate public interest, the hearing that will decide whether Rosemary West will be committed for trial on 10 murder charges began yesterday. Scores of photographers and television cameramen outnumbered a small crowd of local people as Mrs West, 41, arrived for the hearing at Dursley magistrates' court, near Stroud, Gloucestershire, in a police van with blacked-out windows.

The love that dares to speak its name

"Big bubbly brunette seeks strapping guy, 17 to 25. Living people need not apply. Will provide big black roomy car for romantic getaways." "Middle-aged male seeks one-legged partner. Other leg optional, but must be removeable." "Young male seeks long coil of wire and full-length mirror. But hurry: one of us dies each week in the UK alone."

THE CHRONOLOGY: How the inquiry unfolded as the body count rose

The arrest of Frederick West triggered one of the biggest police investigations in recent times. West was detained on 25 February last year with his wife Rosemary by detectives investigating the disappearance of their daughter, Heather, last seen alive aged 16 in 1987.

How We Met: Anne Robinson and Paul Edmonds

Anne Robinson, 49, writes and presents Points of View and presents Watchdog for the BBC. She also writes for the Times and Today. Married to publisher Jonathan Penrose, she has a daughter, Emma, by her first husband, ex-Times editor Charles Wilson, and a dog, Maud Alabama.

Labour leader wants Mirror boss sacked

JOHN SMITH, leader of the Labour Party, is pressing the banks that control 54 per cent of Mirror Group Newspapers' shares to sack the group's chief executive, David Montgomery, the former editor of Today and the News of the World.

Media / Talk of the Trade: Mirror image

RICHARD STOTT, the sacked editor of the Daily Mirror, is wreaking revenge, re-creating the best features of the Mirror at Today. So far he has taken top writers (Alastair Campbell, Anne Robinson) and editing staff (its entire features bench), plus the women's editor, Mary Riddell. Mr Stott wants Today to aim at the mass middle market, between the Mirror and Daily Mail. February sales are estimated at 541,000, up 80,000 on a year ago. Today's political stance is to be independent: editorials already say that the Government is terrible, but that Labour has yet to provide the answer. A comment this week on television violence, praising the BBC 1 controller, Alan Yentob, has won Mr Stott new respect from broadcasters.
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