News

Wreckage of the three-tonne Eurocopter has reportedly arrived at the AAIB base in Farnborough, Hampshire

Comedians should stop trying to be funny

I once saw Billy Connolly on TV talking about Charles Rennie Macintosh's home in France. The place looked so ravishing, my wife and I went on holiday there several times. So I owe him a debt, and am repaying it pretty badly by wondering why his New Zealand travelogue on BBC 1 on Saturday was so desperately unsatisfactory. I like Billy Connolly. New Zealand is a place I'd like to go to. So why was it such a wretchedly empty programme?

Letter: Funding the BBC

Sir: Over the coming weeks, the Government will decide its response to the Davies Report on the funding of the BBC. It is a critical moment not just for the BBC, but for the future of broadcasting in this country.

Music: Pictures from an exhibitionist

It began with Queen. So, as you might expect, video has always pandered to pop's worst instincts. By Michael Collins

Leading Article: God save the Queen

THE MILLENNIUM crowd are determined to put a smile on Her Majesty's face, with a "cookin'" version of the National Anthem to be performed at the Millennium Dome on New Year's Eve. The standard model was reckoned to be "leaden", so the Queen will sit through a version that includes samba drummers and Jools Holland on the piano.

Success kills off `McSocrates', Scotland's working-class hero

HE WAS the epitome of Scotland's rejection of Thatcherism: surly, scruffy, unemployed and with an attitude problem. But now Rab C Nesbitt, Scotland's favourite comic philosopher, is to hang up his string vest.

Secretarial: He keeps the adrenaline running

I Work For: Alison Prince works for Jeffrey Archer, author and candidate for new Mayor of London

The Information: New Films

THE BIG HIT (18, 91 mins)

Scots reveal anti-English sentiment

IT MAY be regarded as the banter of friendly rivalry but the Scottish view of the English as "the auld enemy" may conceal deeper racist tendencies.

Rugby Union: Gregan supplies engine power

Wallabies' scrum-half relishes the challenge of England on Saturday.

Football: Celtic send for Dalglish and Barnes

KENNY DALGLISH returned to Celtic yesterday after an absence of 22 years from the place he calls home, took an appreciative nod at Parkhead's physical transformation and smiled: "It's changed a lot since the last time I was here. They must have spent my transfer [money] well."

Arguments for Easter: The day when even God needs a scapegoat

Poor Judas. The tendency to lay the blame for the sin of the world at the feet of one man is not restricted to Gospel writers. Look around
Arts and Entertainment
Gregg Wallace in Summer's Supermarket Secrets
tv All of this year's 15 contestants have now been named
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The giant banner displayed by Legia Warsaw supporters last night
football Polish side was ejected from Champions League
Arts and Entertainment
Could we see Iain back in the Bake Off tent next week?
tv Contestant teased Newsnight viewers on potential reappearance
Life and Style
A picture taken on January 12, 2011 shows sex shops at the Paris district of Pigalle.
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i100(and it's got nothing to do with the Great British Bake Off)
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Angelina Jolie with her father Jon Voight
peopleAsked whether he was upset not to be invited, he responded by saying he was busy with the Emmy Awards
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Bill Kerr has died aged 92
peopleBill Kerr appeared in Hancock’s Half Hour and later worked alongside Spike Milligan and Peter Sellers
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news It's not just the world that's a mess at the moment...
Sport
footballPremiership preview: All the talking points ahead of this weekend's matches
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Keira Knightley poses topless for a special September The Photographer's issue of Interview Magazine, out now
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Day In a Page

Burgundy, the River Rhone & Provence – MS Swiss Corona - seven nights from £999pp
Lake Maggiore, Orta and the Matterhorn – seven nights from £899pp
Sicily – seven nights from £939pp
Pompeii, Capri and the Bay of Naples - seven nights from £799pp
Istanbul Ephesus & Troy – six nights from £859pp
Mary Rose – two nights from £319pp
Ukraine crisis: The phoney war is over as Russian troops and armour pour across the border

The phoney war is over

Russian troops and armour pour into Ukraine
Potatoes could be off the menu as crop pests threaten UK

Potatoes could be off the menu as crop pests threaten UK

The world’s entire food system is under attack - and Britain is most at risk, according to a new study
Gangnam smile: why the Chinese are flocking to South Korea to buy a new face

Gangnam smile: why the Chinese are flocking to South Korea to buy a new face

Seoul's plastic surgery industry is booming thanks to the popularity of the K-Pop look
From Mozart to Orson Welles: Creative geniuses who peaked too soon

Creative geniuses who peaked too soon

After the death of Sandy Wilson, 90, who wrote his only hit musical in his twenties, John Walsh wonders what it's like to peak too soon and go on to live a life more ordinary
Caught in the crossfire of a cyber Cold War

Caught in the crossfire of a cyber Cold War

Fears are mounting that Vladimir Putin has instructed hackers to target banks like JP Morgan
Salomé's feminine wiles have inspired writers, painters and musicians for 2,000 years

Salomé: A head for seduction

Salomé's feminine wiles have inspired writers, painters and musicians for 2,000 years. Now audiences can meet the Biblical femme fatale in two new stage and screen projects
From Bram Stoker to Stanley Kubrick, the British Library's latest exhibition celebrates all things Gothic

British Library celebrates all things Gothic

Forthcoming exhibition Terror and Wonder: The Gothic Imagination will be the UK's largest ever celebration of Gothic literature
The Hard Rock Café's owners are embroiled in a bitter legal dispute - but is the restaurant chain worth fighting for?

Is the Hard Rock Café worth fighting for?

The restaurant chain's owners are currently embroiled in a bitter legal dispute
Caribbean cuisine is becoming increasingly popular in the UK ... and there's more to it than jerk chicken at carnival

In search of Caribbean soul food

Caribbean cuisine is becoming increasingly popular in the UK ... and there's more to it than jerk chicken at carnival
11 best face powders

11 best face powders

Sweep away shiny skin with our pick of the best pressed and loose powder bases
England vs Norway: Roy Hodgson's hands tied by exploding top flight

Roy Hodgson's hands tied by exploding top flight

Lack of Englishmen at leading Premier League clubs leaves manager hamstrung
Angel Di Maria and Cristiano Ronaldo: A tale of two Manchester United No 7s

Di Maria and Ronaldo: A tale of two Manchester United No 7s

They both inherited the iconic shirt at Old Trafford, but the £59.7m new boy is joining a club in a very different state
Israel-Gaza conflict: No victory for Israel despite weeks of death and devastation

Robert Fisk: No victory for Israel despite weeks of devastation

Palestinians have won: they are still in Gaza, and Hamas is still there
Mary Beard writes character reference for Twitter troll who called her a 'slut'

Unlikely friends: Mary Beard and the troll who called her a ‘filthy old slut’

The Cambridge University classicist even wrote the student a character reference
America’s new apartheid: Prosperous white districts are choosing to break away from black cities and go it alone

America’s new apartheid

Prosperous white districts are choosing to break away from black cities and go it alone