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Wreckage of the three-tonne Eurocopter has reportedly arrived at the AAIB base in Farnborough, Hampshire

Film: Also showing: Like driving with the brakes on

PRIMAL FEAR Gregory Hoblit (18) UNE FEMME FRANCAISE Regis Wargnier (18) SPY HARD Rick Friedberg (PG) ANGUS Patrick Read Johnson (12) MUPPET TREASURE ISLAND Brian Henson (U)

Two hundred diners in search of a stereotype and celluloid Scots

"ODDLY enough, Trollope himself was not a great admirer of Lincoln's Inn."

`EastEnders' tops the complaints ratings

`EastEnders' tops the complaints ratings

Comedy Mark Little Sucks The Alban Arena, St Albans

The first applause for Mark Little at St Albans last week came early on in the show, when he shouted through a megaphone, "Get down off the couch, Bouncer." The man who for some people will for ever be Joe Mangel was understandably keen to get the Neighbours gags over with sharpish. "I know there's a fair whack of you out there who still think Neighbours is a documentary," he sighed. "The big thing people always say to me in the street is, 'I'm sorry Bouncer's dead.' " He kept making a point of swearing to shock people who may have thought to themselves, "Joe Mangel would never use that kind of language." When Little talked about his mother, a heckler shouted out, "We've seen your mum, she's Mrs Mangel." "That's right, Mrs Mangel's my mum," Little replied, smiling patronisingly. "You've gotta humour them."

The one-hit wonder is common to most fields of endeavour. Charles Darwin came up with the evolution thing, but after that, what?

On Wednesday night I attended the celebrity premiere of Clint Eastwood's The Bridges of Madison County. I very rarely get invited to these dos, which is tragic, because shallow moron that I am, I love everything about them. I love walking along the long tunnel of shouting crowds - something that every sensitive, intelligent person I know finds demeaning and embarrassing. I love seeing all the other celebrities. And I really, really, love getting in to see movies for free. Going to one of these premieres reminds me of bunking into the Saturday morning matinee at the local cinema, except now it's the police and the cinema staff who are sneaking down and opening the fire doors for me.

Unpaid, unsung and ready to tell the truth

ON FRIDAY, while I was reading about Hugh Grant as usual, I got a call that told me I would not be needed after all as a minor witness in a libel trial. This was disappointing. I hadn't libelled anyone - if anyone had, and we don't know because the case isn't over; it was a publishing company with which I've no connection - and I was looking forward to a relatively relaxed time in the witness box. Like many reporters and editors, I have been charged with libel. Lawyers for reporters and editors, however, tend not to ask them to stand up in court. The wisdom is that juries are not impressed by their veracity. The one time I offered, my lawyer said:

Bafta revelations shock and amaze

Thanks to exhaustive trawling through last year's big and small screen offerings, extensive insider dealing and actionable industrial espionage, I can exclusively reveal the winners of the following Bafta awards for television ahead of tonight's glittering ceremony (8.35pm BBC1). (Well, it's hosted by Billy Connolly and Liz Hurley will be there.)

Comedy goes black to basics

Ask your average Saturday night prime-time BBC1 viewer what black comedy means and he'll blink and mutter something about Lenny Henry, before admitting defeat: "Black-and-white minstrels don't count, do they mate?"

Lord Crudwick insists on savouring the moment

Today I bring you the closing moments of this year's Moment Of The Year Award Ceremony, the glittering occasion at which the most significant single moment of 1994 is given its due.

You want a successful comedy video, you need an 18 certificate: Mark Wa reham's guide to the top 5 filth merchants

Chubby Brown Jingle Bx@!cks Appearance: Patchwork tails, flying helmet Material: His big member, masturbation, the wife Songs: "Dolly Parton's tits"

COMEDY / Green giant: Jeff Green makes adult jokes about male inadequacy, but his good looks have brought him respectability. He charmed James Rampton

Billy Connolly came to see Jeff Green's Perrier-nominated show at Edinburgh. 'It was like Marlon Brando coming to a school play,' Green laughs. 'I'm glad I didn't know, or I would have gone to pieces. All the people around him were nervously waiting to see when he laughed. But he came up to me afterwards and said, 'that was good. It was non-macho, you were just having a gas.' That was a real honour for me - I've followed him since Parkinson. It was worth more to me than the Perrier nomination.'

The Edinburgh Festival: Comedy: And all for the price of a Clydeside puppet show

THE Edinburgh Festival throws performers and audience together in a confined space in an atmosphere of barely suppressed hysteria. Interesting etiquette quandaries result, such as how to behave when the person who elbows you sharply to one side in their eagerness to get to the bar turns out to be someone you just paid six, seven or even eight pounds to make you laugh. Most people seem to handle this quite well, and if comedians are troubled by the knowledge that for the price of listening to them for an hour, their audience could have experienced not one but two troops of Clydeside puppeteers, they manage not to show it.

Profile: No mercy for the Big Man: Billy Connolly, the comedian Scotland can't forgive

'I F YOU LEAVE Scotland,' said a friend of Billy Connolly, 'then get successful and come back, it's Who do you think you are? If you don't make it and come back, they say, I could have told you you needn't have bothered.' The trouble with Billy Connolly is that his native Scotland can't decide which category he's in.

Quiff me quick: Mark Lamarr is giving up being nasty on TV's The Word to concentrate on being funny on stage. James Rampton met him and lived

Mark Lamarr is giving up presenting The Word because he's had enough of people referring to him as The Word's Mark Lamarr. Fair enough: who would want to end up like the 60-year-old man still known as Blue Peter's John Noakes? But this move also gives Lamarr the chance to spend more time with one of his other careers - as a highly accomplished stand-up comedian.
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Sepp Blatter resignation: The beginning of Fifa's long road to reform?

Does Blatter's departure mean Fifa will automatically clean up its act?

Don't bet on it, says Tom Peck
Charles Kennedy: The baby of the House who grew into a Lib Dem giant

The baby of the House who grew into a Lib Dem giant

Charles Kennedy was consistently a man of the centre-left, dedicated to social justice, but was also a champion of liberty and an opponent of the nanny-state, says Baroness Williams
Syria civil war: The harrowing testament of a five-year-old victim of this endless conflict

The harrowing testament of a five-year-old victim of Syria's endless civil war

Sahar Qanbar lost her mother and brother as civilians and government soldiers fought side by side after being surrounded by brutal Islamist fighters. Robert Fisk visited her
The future of songwriting: How streaming is changing everything we know about making music

The future of songwriting

How streaming is changing everything we know about making music
William Shemin and Henry Johnson: Jewish and black soldiers receive World War I Medal of Honor amid claims of discrimination

Recognition at long last

Jewish and black soldiers who fought in WWI finally receive medals after claims of discrimination
Beating obesity: The new pacemaker which helps over-eaters

Beating obesity

The new pacemaker which helps over-eaters
9 best women's festival waterproofs

Ready for rain: 9 best women's festival waterproofs

These are the macs to keep your denim dry and your hair frizz-free(ish)
Cycling World Hour Record: Nervous Sir Bradley Wiggins ready for pain as he prepares to go distance

Wiggins worried

Nervous Sir Bradley ready for pain as he prepares to attempt cycling's World Hour Record
Liverpool close in on Milner signing

Liverpool close in on Milner signing

Reds baulk at Christian Benteke £32.5m release clause
On your feet! Spending at least two hours a day standing reduces the risk of heart attacks, cancer and diabetes, according to new research

On your feet!

Spending half the day standing 'reduces risk of heart attacks and cancer'
With scores of surgeries closing, what hope is there for the David Cameron's promise of 5,000 more GPs and a 24/7 NHS?

The big NHS question

Why are there so few new GPs when so many want to study medicine?
Big knickers are back: Thongs ain't what they used to be

Thongs ain't what they used to be

Big knickers are back
Thurston Moore interview

Thurston Moore interview

On living in London, Sonic Youth and musical memoirs
In full bloom

In full bloom

Floral print womenswear
From leading man to Elephant Man, Bradley Cooper is terrific

From leading man to Elephant Man

Bradley Cooper is terrific