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Wreckage of the three-tonne Eurocopter has reportedly arrived at the AAIB base in Farnborough, Hampshire

Film: Also showing: Like driving with the brakes on

PRIMAL FEAR Gregory Hoblit (18) UNE FEMME FRANCAISE Regis Wargnier (18) SPY HARD Rick Friedberg (PG) ANGUS Patrick Read Johnson (12) MUPPET TREASURE ISLAND Brian Henson (U)

Two hundred diners in search of a stereotype and celluloid Scots

"ODDLY enough, Trollope himself was not a great admirer of Lincoln's Inn."

`EastEnders' tops the complaints ratings

`EastEnders' tops the complaints ratings

Comedy Mark Little Sucks The Alban Arena, St Albans

The first applause for Mark Little at St Albans last week came early on in the show, when he shouted through a megaphone, "Get down off the couch, Bouncer." The man who for some people will for ever be Joe Mangel was understandably keen to get the Neighbours gags over with sharpish. "I know there's a fair whack of you out there who still think Neighbours is a documentary," he sighed. "The big thing people always say to me in the street is, 'I'm sorry Bouncer's dead.' " He kept making a point of swearing to shock people who may have thought to themselves, "Joe Mangel would never use that kind of language." When Little talked about his mother, a heckler shouted out, "We've seen your mum, she's Mrs Mangel." "That's right, Mrs Mangel's my mum," Little replied, smiling patronisingly. "You've gotta humour them."

The one-hit wonder is common to most fields of endeavour. Charles Darwin came up with the evolution thing, but after that, what?

On Wednesday night I attended the celebrity premiere of Clint Eastwood's The Bridges of Madison County. I very rarely get invited to these dos, which is tragic, because shallow moron that I am, I love everything about them. I love walking along the long tunnel of shouting crowds - something that every sensitive, intelligent person I know finds demeaning and embarrassing. I love seeing all the other celebrities. And I really, really, love getting in to see movies for free. Going to one of these premieres reminds me of bunking into the Saturday morning matinee at the local cinema, except now it's the police and the cinema staff who are sneaking down and opening the fire doors for me.

Unpaid, unsung and ready to tell the truth

ON FRIDAY, while I was reading about Hugh Grant as usual, I got a call that told me I would not be needed after all as a minor witness in a libel trial. This was disappointing. I hadn't libelled anyone - if anyone had, and we don't know because the case isn't over; it was a publishing company with which I've no connection - and I was looking forward to a relatively relaxed time in the witness box. Like many reporters and editors, I have been charged with libel. Lawyers for reporters and editors, however, tend not to ask them to stand up in court. The wisdom is that juries are not impressed by their veracity. The one time I offered, my lawyer said:

Bafta revelations shock and amaze

Thanks to exhaustive trawling through last year's big and small screen offerings, extensive insider dealing and actionable industrial espionage, I can exclusively reveal the winners of the following Bafta awards for television ahead of tonight's glittering ceremony (8.35pm BBC1). (Well, it's hosted by Billy Connolly and Liz Hurley will be there.)

Comedy goes black to basics

Ask your average Saturday night prime-time BBC1 viewer what black comedy means and he'll blink and mutter something about Lenny Henry, before admitting defeat: "Black-and-white minstrels don't count, do they mate?"

Lord Crudwick insists on savouring the moment

Today I bring you the closing moments of this year's Moment Of The Year Award Ceremony, the glittering occasion at which the most significant single moment of 1994 is given its due.

You want a successful comedy video, you need an 18 certificate: Mark Wa reham's guide to the top 5 filth merchants

Chubby Brown Jingle Bx@!cks Appearance: Patchwork tails, flying helmet Material: His big member, masturbation, the wife Songs: "Dolly Parton's tits"

COMEDY / Green giant: Jeff Green makes adult jokes about male inadequacy, but his good looks have brought him respectability. He charmed James Rampton

Billy Connolly came to see Jeff Green's Perrier-nominated show at Edinburgh. 'It was like Marlon Brando coming to a school play,' Green laughs. 'I'm glad I didn't know, or I would have gone to pieces. All the people around him were nervously waiting to see when he laughed. But he came up to me afterwards and said, 'that was good. It was non-macho, you were just having a gas.' That was a real honour for me - I've followed him since Parkinson. It was worth more to me than the Perrier nomination.'

The Edinburgh Festival: Comedy: And all for the price of a Clydeside puppet show

THE Edinburgh Festival throws performers and audience together in a confined space in an atmosphere of barely suppressed hysteria. Interesting etiquette quandaries result, such as how to behave when the person who elbows you sharply to one side in their eagerness to get to the bar turns out to be someone you just paid six, seven or even eight pounds to make you laugh. Most people seem to handle this quite well, and if comedians are troubled by the knowledge that for the price of listening to them for an hour, their audience could have experienced not one but two troops of Clydeside puppeteers, they manage not to show it.

Profile: No mercy for the Big Man: Billy Connolly, the comedian Scotland can't forgive

'I F YOU LEAVE Scotland,' said a friend of Billy Connolly, 'then get successful and come back, it's Who do you think you are? If you don't make it and come back, they say, I could have told you you needn't have bothered.' The trouble with Billy Connolly is that his native Scotland can't decide which category he's in.

Quiff me quick: Mark Lamarr is giving up being nasty on TV's The Word to concentrate on being funny on stage. James Rampton met him and lived

Mark Lamarr is giving up presenting The Word because he's had enough of people referring to him as The Word's Mark Lamarr. Fair enough: who would want to end up like the 60-year-old man still known as Blue Peter's John Noakes? But this move also gives Lamarr the chance to spend more time with one of his other careers - as a highly accomplished stand-up comedian.
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Scottish referendum: The Yes vote was the love that dared speak its name, but it was not to be

Despite the result, this is the end of the status quo

Boyd Tonkin on the fall-out from the Scottish referendum
Manolo Blahnik: The high priest of heels talks flats, Englishness, and why he loves Mary Beard

Manolo Blahnik: Flats, Englishness, and Mary Beard

The shoe designer who has been dubbed 'the patron saint of the stiletto'
The Beatles biographer reveals exclusive original manuscripts of some of the best pop songs ever written

Scrambled eggs and LSD

Behind The Beatles' lyrics - thanks to Hunter Davis's original manuscript copies
'Normcore' fashion: Blending in is the new standing out in latest catwalk non-trend

'Normcore': Blending in is the new standing out

Just when fashion was in grave danger of running out of trends, it only went and invented the non-trend. Rebecca Gonsalves investigates
Dance’s new leading ladies fight back: How female vocalists are now writing their own hits

New leading ladies of dance fight back

How female vocalists are now writing their own hits
Mystery of the Ground Zero wedding photo

A shot in the dark

Mystery of the wedding photo from Ground Zero
His life, the universe and everything

His life, the universe and everything

New biography sheds light on comic genius of Douglas Adams
Save us from small screen superheroes

Save us from small screen superheroes

Shows like Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D are little more than marketing tools
Reach for the skies

Reach for the skies

From pools to football pitches, rooftop living is looking up
These are the 12 best hotel spas in the UK

12 best hotel spas in the UK

Some hotels go all out on facilities; others stand out for the sheer quality of treatments
These Iranian-controlled Shia militias used to specialise in killing American soldiers. Now they are fighting Isis, backed up by US airstrikes

Widespread fear of Isis is producing strange bedfellows

Iranian-controlled Shia militias that used to kill American soldiers are now fighting Isis, helped by US airstrikes
Topshop goes part Athena poster, part last spring Prada

Topshop goes part Athena poster, part last spring Prada

Shoppers don't come to Topshop for the unique
How to make a Lego masterpiece

How to make a Lego masterpiece

Toy breaks out of the nursery and heads for the gallery
Meet the ‘Endies’ – city dwellers who are too poor to have fun

Meet the ‘Endies’ – city dwellers who are too poor to have fun

Urbanites are cursed with an acronym pointing to Employed but No Disposable Income or Savings
Paisley’s decision to make peace with IRA enemies might remind the Arabs of Sadat

Ian Paisley’s decision to make peace with his IRA enemies

His Save Ulster from Sodomy campaign would surely have been supported by many a Sunni imam