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At least not in the way we perceive them now, he suggests

Canadian found guilty of UK terror plot

A judge today found a Canadian suspect guilty of being involved in a plot to bomb British targets in 2004.

Last Night's Television: Who Do You Think You Are?, BBC1<br />Hole In The Wall, iPlayer<br />Greg Dyke on NYE Bevan, BBC4

I love iPlayer. I was having a little difficulty mustering interest in Jodie Kidd's ancestry, the subject of this week's Who Do You Think You Are? So I stuck it on pause and decided to catch up with Hole in the Wall instead, the BBC's new Saturday-tea-time game show, which began last weekend, but got nudged below the radar by Merlin. And, frankly, I'm very grateful to the BBC for preserving the evidence of its own inexplicable folly in this readily accessible form. I wouldn't have missed it for the world. A few television programmes are excellent, a larger number are good, and the vast majority are mediocre to poor. But it's only a few that qualify as memorably atrocious; programmes so cheesy and bereft of virtue that they will return through the ages as a regurgitated belch of "what were they thinking?"

Exit Lines, by Joan Barfoot

The rage of the aged: a haunting, disturbing tale of growing old disgracefully

Canada's Harper calls election

Canada's Prime Minister, Stephen Harper, has dissolved Parliament and called an early election for next month, in the hope of strengthening his Conservative minority government's hold on power.

Album: Juan Garcia Esquivel, More of Other Worlds, Other Sounds (Reprise Archives)

Mexican lounge-music auteur Juan Garcia Esquivel's flamboyant arrangements of standards such as "The Breeze and I (Andalucia)", "I Get a Kick Out of You" and "Dancing in the Dark" on this reissued 1962 album are like ripe fruit, flavour bursting out of every bar.

British youngsters hurt in tour bus crash

A tour bus reported to be carrying British youngsters was involved in a head-on crash in Canada tonight.

Standard Life profits rise by 51 per cent with help of reinsurance deal

Standard Life's profits beat forecasts yesterday but the life insurer warned that the outlook for the sector was impossible to call in difficult markets.

Bus passenger beheads fellow traveller during random attack

A 40-year-old man has been charged with second-degree murder after a busload of passengers saw him stab a fellow traveller and then cut off his head on a Greyhound bus driving on the Trans-Canada highway.

Couple fined over 'sex games' at war memorial

A French couple has been fined €1,000 for making a pornographic video at Vimy Ridge, one of the most revered memorials of the First World War.

McCartney urges Quebec to 'smoke the pipes of peace'

Sir Paul McCartney was expected to find the appropriate French translation for "Let it be" last night while headlining an outdoor concert in Quebec, in the hope of finally disarming francophone indignation over his invitation to help the province celebrate its 400th anniversary.

Album: Bodies of Water, A Certain Feeling (Secretly Canadian)

Indie-gospel, the bloggers are calling it. And, yes, it does seem that the debut album proper from LA-based quartet Bodies of Water marks a defining moment in a sound that has seeped through Danielson into the DNA of Bright Eyes and Arcade Fire.

Ones to Watch: Holy Fuck

Introducing the top bands making a splash at the festivals

Pets' Corner: What are the red patches on my poodle?

My poodle returned from the groomers with a red patch on his tummy which is very sore and he will not let anyone touch him. Do you know what this is and how can I help him feel more comfortable? Lenie, Canada

My new baby is destroying my perfect designer home

Design-freak-turned-new-mother Fiona Rattray's life may never be the same again, but whose home sure as hell will be
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Pro-Russia rebels guard a train containing the bodies of victims of the Malaysia Airlines flight MH 17 crash in Torez, Ukraine
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Tycoons' text: Warren Buffett and Bill Gates both cite John Brookes' 'Business Adventures' as their favourite book
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<p>Troubled actor Robert Downey Jr cements his comeback from drug problems by bagging the lead role in Iron Man. Two further films follow</p>
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Sign here, please: Magna Carta Island
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Day In a Page

Burgundy, the River Rhone & Provence – MS Swiss Corona - seven nights from £999pp
Lake Maggiore, Orta and the Matterhorn – seven nights from £899pp
Sicily – seven nights from £939pp
Pompeii, Capri and the Bay of Naples - seven nights from £799pp
Istanbul Ephesus & Troy – six nights from £859pp
Mary Rose – two nights from £319pp
Some are reformed drug addicts. Some are single mums. All are on benefits. But now these so-called 'scroungers’ are fighting back

The 'scroungers’ fight back

The welfare claimants battling to alter stereotypes
Amazing video shows Nasa 'flame extinguishment experiment' in action

Fireballs in space

Amazing video shows Nasa's 'flame extinguishment experiment' in action
A Bible for billionaires

A Bible for billionaires

Find out why America's richest men are reading John Brookes
Paranoid parenting is on the rise - and our children are suffering because of it

Paranoid parenting is on the rise

And our children are suffering because of it
For sale: Island where the Magna Carta was sealed

Magna Carta Island goes on sale

Yours for a cool £4m
Phone hacking scandal special report: The slide into crime at the 'News of the World'

The hacker's tale: the slide into crime at the 'News of the World'

Glenn Mulcaire was jailed for six months for intercepting phone messages. James Hanning tells his story in a new book. This is an extract
We flinch, but there are degrees of paedophilia

We flinch, but there are degrees of paedophilia

Child abusers are not all the same, yet the idea of treating them differently in relation to the severity of their crimes has somehow become controversial
The truth about conspiracy theories is that some require considering

The truth about conspiracy theories is that some require considering

For instance, did Isis kill the Israeli teenagers to trigger a war, asks Patrick Cockburn
Alistair Carmichael: 'The UK as a whole is greater than the sum of its parts'

Alistair Carmichael: 'The UK as a whole is greater than the sum of its parts'

Meet the man who doesn't want to go down in history as the country's last Scottish Secretary
Legoland Windsor's master model-makers reveal the tricks of their trade (including how to stop the kids wrecking your Eiffel Tower)

Meet the people who play with Lego for a living

They are the master builders: Lego's crack team of model-makers, who have just glued down the last of 650,000 bricks as they recreate Paris in Windsor. Susie Mesure goes behind the scenes
The 20 best days out for the summer holidays: From Spitfires to summer ferry sailings

20 best days out for the summer holidays

From summer ferry sailings in Tyne and Wear and adventure days at Bear Grylls Survival Academy to Spitfires at the Imperial War Museum Duxford and bog-snorkelling at the World Alternative Games...
Open-air theatres: If all the world is a stage, then everyone gets in on the act

All the wood’s a stage

Open-air productions are the cue for better box-office receipts, new audiences, more interesting artistic challenges – and a picnic
Rand Paul is a Republican with an eye on the world

Rupert Cornwell: A Republican with an eye on the world

Rand Paul is laying out his presidential stall by taking on his party's disastrous record on foreign policy
Self-preservation society: Pickles are moving from the side of your plate to become the star dish

Self-preservation society

Pickles are moving from the side of your plate to become the star dish
Generation gap opens a career sinkhole

Britons live ever longer, but still society persists in glorifying youth

We are living longer but considered 'past it' younger, the reshuffle suggests. There may be trouble ahead, says DJ Taylor