Things To Do Before You're 30 (15)

The British film industry scores another own goal with this painful low budget ensemble comedy about a South London Sunday league football team that's preparing to disband after 20 years of kickabouts. It's a film so bad that they even got the title wrong, raising the question of why nobody, during the entire production process, pointed out that most of the cast are closer to 40, and that the "Things To Do" concept takes an early bath within 10 minutes. Nor is it ever explained why the team is breaking up. The only tangible reason is that the women in the film, without exception, disdain their partners' hobby as "pathetic", which implies that Dougray Scott and co might be better off jilting their girlfriends and sticking with their footie.