Lyric sheets

Eurythmics star Dave Stewart has pulled his contribution out of a forthcoming ICA exhibition. It was to have been a giant inflatable model of his bottom...

ROCK BOTTOM

The art world reeled, the pop world spun

When Sunderland's most famous son

Afflicted by good taste no doubt

Announced he'd pulled his bottom out

The organisers in despair

Were sad he'd left it in the air

And since the stern would not be seen

They wondered how it might have been

They knew it was inflatable

The rest was all debatable

Magritte perhaps? With buttock face?

A pale pitted moon in space?

A horse-hair chair with razor slash?

Or Dali-esque with prop and 'tache?

Or would it take a modern view?

Formaldehyde, then sawn in two?

What made the star abort his plans

And how will he console his fans?

His B-side won't be on display

Come Autumn at the ICA

So has he left the thing too late?

Or are we left to speculate

That even Damien Hirst, his friend

Could not endorse his dorsal end?