Quotes of the Week

"What is Linford Christie's lunchbox?" - His Honour Mr Justice Popplewell

"I don't want to look a gift horse in the mouth, let alone a Hollywood producer waving a large cheque" - Will Self, who has been signed to write his first screenplay

"The single currency is a dangerous political instrument which would destroy our national democracy" - Tory peer Lord Tebbit

"He knew that I was the first black woman to appear on the cover of Vogue and that Kate Moss started the revolution of little models. So I suppose we were both revolutionaries in his eyes" - Naomi Campbell, after meeting the Cuban leader Fidel Castro

"Yorkshiremen never worry about class. If I met somebody snooty, I would just think he was an idiot" - Tom Kilburn, leader of the British team that built the world's first computer

"They are very nicely behaved, unlike Labour" - Peter Stringfellow, commenting on Conservatives he has entertained at his topless dancer clubs

"They've even measured the depth of my wrinkles" - Commons Speaker Betty Boothroyd, on seeing her new Madame Tussaud's waxwork