TELEVISION / Tabloid Television

Roger Cook, fresh from a violent contretemps with Spanish fishermen, gave his cameramen another run for their money when an interviewee set about his Mitsubishi Shogun with a baseball bat. His assailant's defence was that he is actually 'Mr Nice Guy, but that man brought out the worst in me'. Antiques Roadshow specialist Ian Harris was shot in the arm by a gunman during a robbery at his own jewellers, but revealed that he wasn't frightened by the experience; Ian McShane declared that he is quitting the eight-year-old Lovejoy (BBC1), and the show will be put quietly to bed; the Broadcasting Standards Council registered its disapproval of a number of the sex scenes in BBC1's Lady Chatterley; Des O'Connor, it was revealed by a hospital in Surrey, is top choice as background music requested by mothers who are to give birth; June Brown (Dot Cotton of EastEnders), made a casual remark about face-lifts and awoke the next morning to read she's a whisker away from having one.