From Ultimate Wedding Planner to Crazy Rich Agents, why is the BBC making such joyless reality TV?

This week, two new BBC shows used an ‘Apprentice’-like template to give us banal competitions between, first, estate agents, and then wedding planners. Jessie Thompson wonders when telly got so uptight and formulaic

Let’s call it off: Raj Somaiya, Sara Davies and Fred Sirieix, who judge the BBC’s ‘Ultimate Wedding Planner’ (BBC/Kieron McCarron)

Who among us hasn’t been there? You’re in a meeting. You’re tired. You need to come up with an idea. Your boss is staring at you. The room is deathly silent. Suddenly a thought pops into your head. Before your brain can stop you, your mouth is shouting words: “Crazy rich agents!” But wait – what does it mean? Maybe it doesn’t matter. It sounds good. Hopefully you can work out the rest from there.

This, surely, is how BBC Two came to commission Crazy Rich Agents, a new show that aired on Monday in which a random assortment of young people attempt to sell plush, pricey properties. “None have tackled the world of multimillion-pound real estate,” a severe voiceover told us. Because, during the fastest house price fall in over a decade, who else would you want selling your very expensive property but a 22-year-old who has never sold one before? Crazy Rich Agents is the latest thing to confirm the fact that there is simply too much TV being made right now.

The problem is, while streamers like Netflix, Apple TV and Prime try to outspend each other to win subscriptions, our traditional broadcasters are facing rounds and rounds of brutal cuts. Earlier this year, Channel 4 execs deferred taking bonuses to help keep the peace after a number of progammes were axed, while local radio is the latest part of the BBC undergoing a huge reduction. Perhaps that’s why we’ve ended up on a joyless roundabout of soul-destroyingly basic, low-budget, competitive reality shows that sound like they came from Alan Partridge’s dictaphone.